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Pwned writes to Pwner
Posted on Thursday, January 28 2010 @ 23:14:03 PST

"As I attended the support group for pwned victims
We decided the best way to help resolve and regain our freedom
 is to face our pwners..."

Dear Pwner,

 As a result of being pwned from you last week, I had the ability to grow balls and step up to pwners like yourself. Ever since you called me a; “FAG!” “NOOB!” “GLITCHER!” etc, I began to think the insults you placed in front of me was just to see how “comical” it would be for you to get someone like me upset over and online game. I’m writing you this letter to help your vocabulary, and to help you understand that these words can be more offensive than you thought.

First off, those insults you screamed in your mic can be very offensive to other gamers. You might not be aware of what they mean so I’m going to help you out. Being called a “FAG!” is not offensive to me, I’m completely straight, but it doesn’t mean the listeners aren’t straight. There are few famous celebrities that would slap your ass for calling people “FAG!” over an online game. Ellen DeGenerous, the comedian and talk show host, would probably find ways to make you understand how being called a “FAG!” would be offensive to the homosexual community.


Being called a “NOOB!” is completely childish of you to scream in the mic all because your ass was pwned by a beginner. There’s no reason for you to insult a beginner for kicking your ass in a video game, that’s completely ignorant of you to not appreciate the new players to the community. Unlike you, I would never get irritated and scream that bizarre word in the mic, no instead I would most likely wait until the end of the match and congratulate the new player in hopes he would have a positive feedback about me and who knows, I might even accept his friend request because I wouldn’t be a complete douche.


And for the word “GLITCHER!” I apologize but these are the type of players you’re just going to have to sit back and relax as they try to find bugs or “glitches” in the game. Yes they can use the glitch in a (n) advantage, but they’re also helping out the developers of the game by finding the glitches, and posting them on the internet (usually in forum boards). Not only are other players reading the information, I guarantee developers are searching and finding the information in hopes of providing a better quality to the game

I apologize for calling you offensive names, I’m supposed to share I was at a support group for players who had these certain issues happening. As a result, I was supposed to vent and help regain dignity by writing this letter to a pwner. But why do we need to call each other players these offensive and inappropriate names? I found a solution. Instead of calling me a “FAG!” Why don’t you just simply say, “DAMN IT! GREAT JOB!” Instead of calling me a “NOOB!” Just peacefully scream, “DAMN IT! GREAT JOB NEW PLAYER!” Instead of screaming “GLITCHER!” Please just simply scream, “AMAZING JOB FOR FINDING THAT GLITCH! If that player takes advantage of the glitch, just report the user for cheating.


Not only are you using those names incorrectly, you’re also violating rules. The terms/services that you agreed to in order to play online, you’re completely violating those rules and therefore the consequences could lead to you being banned from their network. I’m sure you don’t want to be banned or suspended in other way, but please for your own safety, learn a new vocabulary of insults. Video Games are great to compete in, but pwners like you ruin the whole community for everyone. So as a warning, please quit pwning people like that. Just simply go after someone else and let the competition stay glory. Thanks for reading this, sincerely,

The Pwned Victim
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