and that's when the whores come in.
Posted on Sunday, December 18 2011 @ 14:29:51 Eastern
Men laying their trick-money down. Twenty dollars to pay the rent? Maybe not. Maybe instead I'll spend it on the WHORE!
It has been recently brought to this community member's attention that there is a complete lack of estrogen browsing around these here forums. Not that we would know how to interact with females if they started to visit, but we do need some DIVERSITY up in this mutha! So, I enlisted the help of my comrads to come up with a solution for this dilemma. The result of our Brainstorming: Advertise!
Ok, advertise - but where?...
Well my friends, where else can men such as us hope to find decent, moral, educated, god-fearing, upstanding young women with similar hobbies as ours - that won't get offended by our smells, jokes, and to be honest looks. Yup, you guessed it - Craigslist. This forced me to ask myself " But where on Craigslist would an ad such as ours go out and potentially get a bite?" Thats when it hit me like Chris Brown, it should go to a section that I frequent fairly often when looking for similar advances from the opposite sex. Sadly, the adult massage section has ben since shut down, so we settled on - Men Seeking Women.
The ad, as it sits, looks something like this:
Video Game Online Forum seeking female members to be apart of our ...ummm.. club..
Ladies, our forums are filled with the highest quality of gamer guru studs the web has to offer.
We don't just wan't ANY ol' rack joining our ranks - we may be nerds,
but we have our standards. Visit our forum at www.gamervolution.com/forum,
register a username, and "Introduce Yo' Self"!
BUT ONLY IF YOU MEET OUR Base Criteria:
(We require our female members to)
-Post once a day
-Specialize in a genre
-Be cute and willing to post pictures
-Be over 18
-Have a functional knowledge of Tosh.0 and web pop culture a plus!
-Any race & religion OK
Stipulations added by our current members:
-Must have a love for British accents
-Must be clean
-Must be 420 Friendly
-If you're Asain, you have to play something other than WoW
-Must be AT LEAST High School Educated
-Speaking English is a preference but not a necessity (no l33t speak!)
-Must have a microphone and be willing to join the community playdates and podcasts
As a general rule:
-No fat uglies.
-No ugly fatties.
-No women that are men.
-No women that are not breathing.
-No women that are being made to breathe artificially.
[If we have women browsing this site, who fit the criteria listed directly above, don't worry - you've been grandfathered into our fold and shall remain a lifetime member]
We already have the Post-Op Female Lesbian angle covered but, traps OK (must post pictures first)
Furries can burn in Hades
[This call is in no way endorsed by the Admins of GR, It is a call from the members within its community - so don't go all feminist on their asses. Come at MEEE, bros.. bras?]
JOIN THE REVOLUTION NOW!
Veiw the full ad here:
Now, Heres where we need your help! I can only post in MY city, but GR is expansive and has members from all over the world. What I want... no. NEED all the readers out there to do is to post this ad in their local city. Then, my fellow comrades, we sit back and wait to be fed grapes by gaming's worthiest of beauties while we play Red Dead Redeption with our feet up and our boobies pressed firmly on our shoulders!!!!
AMIRITE?!WHO'S WITH ME MEN!!!!
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