Holiday Gift Guide 2009
Posted on Tuesday, December 1 @ 16:29:45 Eastern by Nicholas Tan
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Microsoft got it right (who would've thunk?) when it came out with a console focused on multiplayer and online features at a relatively low price. Today, the Xbox360 has a solid hold on the hardcore gaming market (though the PS3 isn't too far behind, mind you) and dominates bro-gamer living rooms and frat parties all over the United States. And Duke's basement, too. Yes, I've been there... what I saw... cannot be unseen.
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Assassin's Creed II
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| Publisher: Ubisoft |
| Genre: Action |
MSRP: $59.99
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They're everywhere. They're sitting on the subway, sleeping on the bus, standing in the elevator, walking out of the gym, heavily clothed, making their presence felt, and they might be behind you right now.
Guys with hoodies. Scary. |
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Dragon Age: Origins
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| Publisher: Electronic Arts |
| Genre: RPG |
MSRP: $59.99
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Wynne: "I believe you were enraptured."
Alistair: "She's our leader. I look to her for guidance."
Wynne: "Oh, I see. So what guidance did you find in those swaying hips, hmm?"
Alistair: "No, no, no. I wasn't looking at, you know, her... hind quarters."
Wynne: "Certainly."
Alistair: "I gazed, glanced, in that direction, maybe, but I wasn't staring, or really seeing anything, even."
Wynee: "Of course."
Alistair: "I hate you. You're a bad person." |
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Buy Dragon Age: Origins |
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Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2
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| Publisher: Activision |
Genre: First-Person Shooter
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MSRP: $59.99
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| "I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones." ~Albert Einstein |
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Buy CoD: Modern Warfare 2
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Borderlands
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Publisher: 2K Games
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Genre: First-Person Shooter RPG
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MSRP: $59.99
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| "Yeah, an old buddy of mine... and by buddy, I mean asshole that ruined my mama's girl parts, needs savin'. So you go on and do that so I can kill him at a later occasion." ~Ernest Whitting |
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Buy Borderlands
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Batman: Arkham Asylum
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| Publisher: Eidos |
Genre: Action Adventure
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MSRP: $59.99
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| "Oh, you. You just couldn't let me go, could you? This is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object. You are truly incorruptible, aren't you? Huh? You won't kill me out of some misplaced sense of self-righteousness. And I won't kill you because you're just too much fun. I think you and I are destined to do this forever." ~The Joker, The Dark Knight |
| Read the full GR Review! |
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Buy Batman: Arkhum Asylum |
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Fight Night Round 4
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Publisher: EA Sports
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| Genre: Sports |
MSRP: $39.99
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| Let me guess. You're just some punk from the Bronx or Brooklyn or some other shmuck hellhole, and you think that you've got a mean right hook. But you're just another asswipe who can skip rope and do pushups. You think you're Rocky. But look at yourself, just goddamn son of a... AWWW!!! UUGGGHHH!!!! FFFUUUUUUUCCCC!!!... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... awww.... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... bitch. |
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Buy Fight Night Round 4
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Forza Motorsport 3
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| Publisher: Electronic Arts |
| Genre: Racing |
MSRP: $59.99
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........................ZEEEEERRRRMMMMMM.......................
................ZZZZZEEEEEEERRRRMMMMMMM.............
.............oh, did you want me to write something?......
.......ZZZZZEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRMMMMMMM...
ZZZZZZEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRMMMMMMM
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| Read the full GR Review! |
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Buy Forza Motorsport 3 |
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Halo 3: ODST
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Publisher: Microsoft
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Genre: First-Person Shooter
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MSRP: $59.99
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| I don't care what you say, you know you want to be saved by Nathan Fillion in a Master Chief get-up. Don't even try to deny your inner fantasy? And if you're still fighting it, then maybe you're not the sci-fi geek i thought you were. Hmm... disappointing... |
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Buy Halo 3: ODST
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Left 4 Dead 2
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| Publisher: Electronic Arts |
| Genre: Horror Action |
MSRP: $59.99
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Ellis: I ever tell you about the time my buddy Keith fell out the rollercoaster? Yeah, he didn't drop far, mind you, just onto the tracks, but the carnival people wouldn't stop the ride 'cause all the other people paid good money and Keith snuck on for free, so he had to dodge for like twenty minutes or so...
Nick: You know what I like best about your stores, Ellis? The sound they make when they stop.
Ellis: Okay.
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| Read the full GR Review! |
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Buy Left 4 Dead 2 |
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Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2
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Publisher: Activision
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Genre: Action
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MSRP: $59.99
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Hey, Deadpool here again. Thought I would say that I don't appear enough in the Holiday Gift Guide or on GameRevolution's site. I know I signed on the bottom line, but what the hell guys? You know the writer is just being lazy, grabbing quotes from everywhere instead of actually doing any work. He doesn't even try to be funny at all like me. Maybe I should just shoot this... ... ... *sorry, GR is experiencing technical difficulties at this time*
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| Read the full GR Review! |
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Buy Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2
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Buy Fallout 3: GotY Edition
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PC PS3 Xbox 360 Wii PSP DS Stocking Stuffers |
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[ Editor's Note: As Nick Olsen is a writer for Theory of Gaming, this won't be counted in the monthly Vox Pop prize. However, it is very much a worthy read. ]
By Nick Olsen
Co-founder, Theory of Gaming
In 1985 Nintendo started a revolution when it...