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Welcome Back to the West
By oneshotstop
Posted on 08/01/16
The only thing that stops the dust is the rain. It’s a sweet reprieve, but there is no middle ground. The land is either as dry as the Betty Ford clinic, or as wet as the ocean floor. Everything can be seen from the ridge overlooking Armadillo as John Marston gently bounces along atop...

Holiday Gift Guide 2009

Posted on Tuesday, December 1 @ 16:29:45 PST by
PC/Windows PS3 XBox 360 Nintendo Wii PSP Nintendo Stocking Stuffers



Microsoft got it right (who would've thunk?) when it came out with a console focused on multiplayer and online features at a relatively low price. Today, the Xbox360 has a solid hold on the hardcore gaming market (though the PS3 isn't too far behind, mind you) and dominates bro-gamer living rooms and frat parties all over the United States. And Duke's basement, too. Yes, I've been there... what I saw... cannot be unseen.




Assassin's Creed II

Publisher: Ubisoft
Genre: Action
MSRP: $59.99
They're everywhere. They're sitting on the subway, sleeping on the bus, standing in the elevator, walking out of the gym, heavily clothed, making their presence felt, and they might be behind you right now.

Guys with hoodies. Scary.
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Dragon Age:Origins

Publisher: Electronic Arts
Genre: RPG
MSRP: $59.99
Wynne: "I believe you were enraptured."
Alistair: "She's our leader. I look to her for guidance."
Wynne: "Oh, I see. So what guidance did you find in those swaying hips, hmm?"
Alistair: "No, no, no. I wasn't looking at, you know, her... hind quarters."
Wynne: "Certainly."
Alistair: "I gazed, glanced, in that direction, maybe, but I wasn't staring, or really seeing anything, even."
Wynee: "Of course."
Alistair: "I hate you. You're a bad person."
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Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2

Publisher: Activision
Genre: First-Person Shooter
MSRP: $59.99
"I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones." ~Albert Einstein
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Borderlands

Publisher: 2K Games
Genre: First-Person Shooter RPG
MSRP: $59.99
"Yeah, an old buddy of mine... and by buddy, I mean asshole that ruined my mama's girl parts, needs savin'. So you go on and do that so I can kill him at a later occasion." ~Ernest Whitting
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Batman: Arkham Asylum

Publisher: Eidos
Genre: Action Adventure
MSRP: $59.99
"Oh, you. You just couldn't let me go, could you? This is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object. You are truly incorruptible, aren't you? Huh? You won't kill me out of some misplaced sense of self-righteousness. And I won't kill you because you're just too much fun. I think you and I are destined to do this forever." ~The Joker, The Dark Knight
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Fight Night Round 4

Publisher: EA Sports
Genre: Sports
MSRP: $39.99
Let me guess. You're just some punk from the Bronx or Brooklyn or some other shmuck hellhole, and you think that you've got a mean right hook. But you're just another asswipe who can skip rope and do pushups. You think you're Rocky. But look at yourself, just goddamn son of a... AWWW!!! UUGGGHHH!!!! FFFUUUUUUUCCCC!!!... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... awww.... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... bitch.
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Forza Motorsport 3

Publisher: Electronic Arts
Genre: Racing
MSRP: $59.99
........................ZEEEEERRRRMMMMMM.......................
................ZZZZZEEEEEEERRRRMMMMMMM.............
.............oh, did you want me to write something?......
.......ZZZZZEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRMMMMMMM...
ZZZZZZEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRMMMMMMM
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Halo 3: ODST

Publisher: Microsoft
Genre: First-Person Shooter
MSRP: $59.99
I don't care what you say, you know you want to be saved by Nathan Fillion in a Master Chief get-up. Don't even try to deny your inner fantasy? And if you're still fighting it, then maybe you're not the sci-fi geek i thought you were. Hmm... disappointing...
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Left 4 Dead 2

Publisher: Electronic Arts
Genre: Horror Action
MSRP: $59.99
Ellis: I ever tell you about the time my buddy Keith fell out the rollercoaster? Yeah, he didn't drop far, mind you, just onto the tracks, but the carnival people wouldn't stop the ride 'cause all the other people paid good money and Keith snuck on for free, so he had to dodge for like twenty minutes or so...
Nick: You know what I like best about your stores, Ellis? The sound they make when they stop.
Ellis: Okay.
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Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2

Publisher: Activision
Genre: Action
MSRP: $59.99
Hey, Deadpool here again. Thought I would say that I don't appear enough in the Holiday Gift Guide or on GameRevolution's site. I know I signed on the bottom line, but what the hell guys? You know the writer is just being lazy, grabbing quotes from everywhere instead of actually doing any work. He doesn't even try to be funny at all like me. MaybeI should just shoot this... ... ... *sorry, GR is experiencing technical difficulties at this time*
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Fallout 3:Game of the Year Edition

Publisher: Bethesda
Genre: RPG
MSRP: $59.99
Since this edition includes about 120+ hours of content, the soundtrack (as good as it is) will begin too repeat far too early. So here are a few recommendations for songs to add to the playlist:

~ Bing Crosby - Dear Hearts and Gentle People
~ Billie Holiday - Detour Ahead, Travelin' Light, I'm Painting The Town Red, What A Little Moonlight Can Do, Yankee Doodle Never Went To Town
~ Cole Porter - You're The Top
~ The Ink Spots - Old Shanty in Old Shanty Town, Whispering Grass


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