From Dick Butkus to Hootie and the Blowfish to Lake Titicaca, bad names have been with us forever. But thanks to the inevitable collision of reclusive nerds, bizarre artists and painfully unhip marketing execs, the video game industry enjoys some of the worst names of all.

The following list was compiled after hours of lively debate, pages of exhausting science and one actual geek fistfight. During this laborious process, we decided to set up a few basic rules:

• All games must have been wide releases for legitimate, popular platforms.
• We tried to avoid games heavy on the Engrish. Translation errors are just too easy.
• So are educational games and porn.

We should also point out that this list in no way indicates the quality of the game itself, merely the quality of its awful title. And we know that some of you will claim that you once played a game in a Korean arcade called "Diarrhea Coughdrop" or something and that it deserves a spot on the list. Cool. Go make one.

After all, Wii did. Let the names begin!