Worst of 2004 Awards

When the world's foremost designer of creepy action figures sets out to make a game, two words come to mind: dark and scary. When it turns out that the game is McFarlane's Evil Prophecy, two more words spring to mind: conniving and bastards.

Remember Gauntlet? Then don't get within a stone's throw of this incomprehensible cluster of code, because it will ruin your pleasant memories of hacking and slashing with its dreary look and dull gameplay. We didn't think this kind of game could be done so badly. Well done.

The first rule of Fight Club is to never, ever play Fight Club. We broke this rule in order to review it and have been paying for our transgression ever since.

You do one thing in Fight Club - you fight - and yet they miraculously made that the worst part of the game. Well, it's the worst part of the game if you discount the story, music and engine.

You are not the games you play. Damn, we hope that's true.

We usually hear about Star Trek games before they show up at the office, but Star Trek: Shattered Universe appeared out of thin air as if beamed straight from the Enterprise.

After one level, we tried unsuccessfully to beam it back.

From its terrible gameplay to its broken missions, does this game suck. It sucks so bad, the publishers didn't want to tell us about it before they sent it along because that would be admitting that they had anything to do with it. Boldly snags the number 3 spot!

We can't say we were surprised when, after one evening spent with Catwoman, Ben declared it the worst game of the year.

It is...almost. The only reason Catwoman didn't scurry off with that award is because we felt a little bad for it. After all, it's yet another victim of the Curse of the Video Game License, albeit the most heinous victim we've ever seen. The control? Atrocious. The gameplay? Laughable. The fact that it makes you acquire 'Bling'? Unforgivable. Even Halle Berry's well-rendered ass couldn't save this hairball from the litterbox.