Budget Game Review of the Week: Soldier of Fortune: Payback
Posted on Thursday, October 6 @ 16:33:44 Eastern by SiliosHere's the skinny, each week I'll go to my local Gamestop and buy a game under twenty dollars, I'll then write a lengthy review about the game, followed by a summary of rather you should skip it or buy it. I don't read video game reviews despite being on this site, I try to stay away from what people say, so I can form my own opinion on the game. Keep in mind these are my opinions, if I say something bad about a game you like, don't get butt hurt over it, it's just my opinion.
Today's review: Soldier of Fortune: Payback - Price $5.99
Ugh... This is why we can't have nice things. Quick story, back in the early 2000's a very gory game came out, graphically it was was pretty impressive, but most of the hoorah came from the game's ultra gory hit detection. Shoot a guy in the face, half his face will be gone. It was a twelve year old's wet dream.
I actually recall playing the first game at friends house, I remember thinking "this is so bland" and now I'm playing the third installment.
This is truly a budget game, it's the crap you expect to find in the bin.
How can I explain this? Image having to ride a bicycle without wheels up a dirt hill. Yeah it's just like that. Enemies have the worst AI I have seen in any game with the exception of Big Rigs. They're basically cannon fodder, and even on the hardest difficulty they'll stand out in the open pointing their gun at you and freeze like deer in headlights. I get that they want to show off the gore, but that's a major problem among its self.
The gore.... Postal 2 had better death animations and gore than this garbage. If you're a gore nut, do yourself a favor and pass on this trash, go watch Riki-Oh or play Mortal Kombat, this game is just plain pathetic. You want to know the sad thing? On the back of the case they actually say "The most outrageous damage modeling ever... Not for the faint of heart". It's like someone was actually proud of this.
Guns all feel the same, and all look the same. Rather you're shooting a shotgun or rifle, it doesn't matter, and it doesn't help that it's painfully obvious they rehashed a lot of textures.
The missions, You basically run from point A to point B killing as many people who get in your way, that's about it. I hear there's plenty of escort missions to boot, but honestly I could force myself to play that far.
I don't know what else to say, besides "terrible". I've literally played XBLA FPS games for the same price and they were leagues better.
You ever hear those stock gun shot sounds? Expect a lot of that in this game. Everything is so "meh" it's cringe worthy. The terrorists you fight have the most racist voice overs imaginable. I feel like the team just went to a local gun club and asked them to do the voice overs in their most bigoted way.
GoldenEye looks better than this game, in fact I go so far to say Soldier of Fortune stole some of the textures from the game. Everything looks the same, cars look like the buildings, blood looks like the sky. There's absolutely no clarity.
SHOULD YOU BUY IT?
Not just "NO", but HELL NO. I paid $5.99 for this and I feel scammed. In fact I'm going back to my Gamestop and trading it in today. If you want a good gory FPS, get UT3. But stay the hell away from this garbage.
And let me just say this, normally with these reviews I try to spend a good portion of time playing them before I make a judgment. Meaning for an FPS I'll play for about two hours, and for RPG's I'll try to finish them. This was different. It was like every moment I left the disc in was akin to someone scratching a chalk board. I played for thirty minutes and had to quit, it's that bad.
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