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FEATURED VOXPOP oneshotstop
Call of Duty will never be the same
By oneshotstop
Posted on 07/28/14
       We've all been there. Everyone remembers that mission. You and your partner are climbing up the mountains in the snow, striving to pull some slick clandestine operation about getting some intel on a bad guy, or something similar (because let's face...

DAILY MANIFESTO

Female Gizmodo Editor Publicly Bashes Magic: The Gathering Champion, Then Gets Bashed By Public

Posted on Tuesday, August 30 @ 12:21:53 Eastern by

Judging people on shallow stuff is human nature, and the magic and absurdity of online dating is how immediately and directly it throws that into relief.

This is how Gizmodo editor Alyssa Bereznak opens her scathing, ridiculous, bitchy rant against her OKCupid date with World Champion Magic: The Gathering Player Jon Finkel.

After receiving lots of dumb, creepy messages on the website, she saw an IM by a guy named Jon who seemed normal: "You should go out with me :)". Jon shows up "dressed in a hedge fund uniform" on their first date, they talk about "normal stuff", and then she finds out that he's the world champion at Magic: The Gathering. She thinks it's a joke, but she doesn't realize she's being Counterspelled.

Soon realizing that he was for real, she goes into a judgmental tizzy on their second date. Yep, a Gizmodo editor going on an anti-geek rant:

Just like you're obligated to mention you're divorced or have a kid in your online profile, shouldn't someone also be required to disclose any indisputably geeky world championship titles? But maybe it was a long time ago? We met for round two later that week.

At dinner I got straight down to it. Did he still play? "Yes." Strike one. How often? "I'm preparing for a tournament this weekend." Strike two. Who did he hang out with? "I've met all my best friends through Magic." Strike three...

This is what happens, I thought, when you leave things out of your online profile. I later found out that Jon infiltrated his way into OKCupid dates with at least two other people I sort of know, including one of my co-workers. Mothers, warn your daughters! This could happen to you...

Maybe I'm an OKCupid asshole for calling it that way. Maybe I'm shallow for not being able to see past Jon's world title. I'll own that.


Owning bitchiness is not an excuse for being bitchy. Do you know why Jon Finkel didn't say he was the World Champion at Magic: The Gathering in his profile? Because of people like Alyssa Bereznak. Strike one. Even worse, she acknowledges the shallowness of her snap judgments. Strike two. And then she totally learns the wrong lesson. Strike three.

No online dating profile in the world is comprehensive enough to highlight every person's peccadillo, or anticipate the inane biases that each of us lugs around. There's no snapshot in the world that can account for our snap judgments.

So what did I learn? Google the shit out of your next online date. Like, hardcore.

No, Alyssa. Beyond the fact that Googling someone just by their first name is dumb, like hardcore, the point is to learn, let's call it, empathy. Or wisdom. Or maturity. Or not abusing your power as an editor to humiliate someone by name just because you're superficial. Or respecting that people have cards in their hand called secrets that they don't want to reveal until they're ready.

If you have no idea what that last bit means, I suggest mentioning that you wrote this now high-profile article, which has garnered 14 responses on Google News and multiple scumbag images on Reddit, on your OKCupid profile. Just like you're obligated to mention you're divorced or have a kid in your online profile, shouldn't someone also be required to disclose any indisputably famous articles you've written? Okay, maybe I'm an asshole for calling this article "famous". I'll own that.

Instead, just reveal your name on OKCupid, so that people can Google the shit out of you before they date you. Like, hardcore.

Tags:   Goodies


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