Update: I was unfortunately not aware of Shamus Young's severe criticism of Fallout 3 available here to link in the original piece and I regret that. It dovetails rather nicely with what I've written and it's much better executed than my piece. I strongly recommend anyone...
Subject: nude patch
Can you tell me, if there is a nude patch for Resident Evil 1&2?
If yes, can you put it on your site?
No, there is not a nude patch
for Res. 1 or 2, and yes, we will put it on our site.
Don't you just love us!
Only the Best!
From: Joe (*****@itis.com)
I was just woundering where the reviewers live? Like,
do they have an apartment or are they just thrown in a
four-sided cubical, never to see the light of day...
What kind of slave driving
company do you think we are running here? Our writers have the best
Four sided cubicals indeed!
We do not use cubicals. Our writers love the great outdoors,
so we keep them shackled to some of the most beautiful and scenic mountain
peaks known to man - Mt. Everest, Mt. Kilimanjaro, K1, Mt. Vesuvius,
Their shackles are made of
stainless steel and they get to stay for as long as they like. We airdrop
a bag of grain and 1 pack of freeze-dried gopher meat every other month.
We care. We really care.
P.S. I can't believe you
thought we would be so cruel. Where do you think Game Revolution is
based...America or something?
Are you being Facetious?
From: "Jollyboy" (*****@aol.com)
Subject: hey aout your review of mkgold
hi i am Justin i think your review really sucks. How can u
say mkgolds graphics are worse than stick fighter???? look
at sega's old mortal kombat i mean come on those grapics
really suck. Since then they have gotten better like in mk4
or trilogy. mk gold's graphics are the best out of any
fighting game like it.
p.s. Mkgold rules
You're right, we're wrong.
MK Gold rocks. It kicks every game's butt. It is the absolute personification
of gaming eloquence. We should burn all our other titles, dance nude
around the bonfire and pledge our undying allegiance to Midway.
From this day forth all newborn
children should only be named after MK Gold characters. Our US flag
should be replaced with a flag displaying the MK logo. All catholic
churches should dispense with the bible, and in it's place should be
the teachings and laws of the Outworld.
Forget the carpenter who
died for your sins. Forget the Torah. Forget the Koran. Forget your
golden pikachu. Forget Krishna. Forget 5000 years of Taoist teachings.
Forget your magic beans, and even your television.
MK Gold. Believe it.
P.S. Now that's what
ya call sarcasm!
What up, Confucious!
From: Badgerturd (*****@aol.com)
after 5 days of coming to your website, i finally
notice what the hell that this is with the paper.
ITS A FORTUNE COOKIE!!!!, sweet huh?
Hi there Badgerturd,
I guess the huge pair of
chopsticks in the foreground just wasn't enough, eh?
P.S. Confucious says: "Man
who cannot recognize chopstick is a very hungry man."
If You Can't Say Anything Nice...?
From: Wak de Rojas (******@aol.com)
Subject: You guys are great
I've been a long time fan of game-revolution, since
the day was searchingthe web and stumbled on your web site.
I have told all my friends about the mighty game-revolution.
There is not a site in the internet that I agree more with,
I am serios. You're site is the first when I want to find
the views of the experts. Those (lude comment) at gamecenter
don't know what they are talking about and gamespot.com and
videogames.com is okay, but nothing like you guys. Game
Revolution shows us the true Art behind gaming and the
wonders that it holds.
At least for me,I know that video games "from all generes"
and from all consoles/computers wouln't be the same
without you guys. I now appreciate video games more than ever.
- Wak de Roja
Thanks Wak de Roja,
So do we make this check
out to "Wak de
Roja," or do you prefer "Duke Ferris?"