GR Mailbag: It's Never What You Expect!

From: "Lenny Landau" (***@hotmail.com)
Subject: Oni's keys
I know this is a really stupid question, but I just had to ask, 
does anyone read the text file anymore?
I find it hardly unlikely, because when I read your review for Oni, 
I read that you said there was no way to re-customize your keys, 
but there is. You just have to open the default_keys text file, 
and insert what you think in what you like to move forward with, 
and etc. At first I didn't know this, but when I bought the game 
and found that I couldn't, I knew there had to be a way. I don't 
mean to insult your intellect, but they do make text files for a 
reason.
-GR reader, Zeke of Orcs

Well, we're impressed that you have the wherewithal to go about editing text files to customize your controls. You get a cookie.

Indeed, the "default key" text file or the .ini file can be altered to bring about all kinds of weird and interesting game hacks. We could probably hex edit Baldur's Gate to play like a first-person shooter.

But that's not a good thing. Almost every game under the sun these days allows you to customize the controls from within the game. You click on 'Options' or something and whammo - swap keys until you're happy.

Oni didn't have this standard feature, which is just unforgivable in a game released in 2001. Editing text files might have been a common need 10 years ago, but our standards have gone up since then.

We demand in-game key customization for every PC title we see these days. They may make text files for a reason, but this shouldn't be one of them.

-GR

From: "Karl Norby" (***@hotmail.com)
Subject: GR people
How do you get involved with GR, i have been to many game 
sites and by far this is the best. I would like to get in 
on the action.
-sskarl

"How do you get involved with GR?"

Aren't you in a hurry? Well hold on, tiger! GR isn't like those other mags you've
been "involved" with. Don't you want to know a little more about us?
Here's a recent ad we ran in the local personals:

Independent Online Magazine seeks soulmate to share deepest
intimacies. I am an intelligent, buxom, 5' 7" beauty of a mag. 
I consider myself athletic, bubbly and brilliant. I'm attracted 
to people who are very critical and can speak their mind. 
I also enjoy Indian food and Tom Hanks. I dislike bad reviews, 
buggy games, Belgium, illiteracy, and switching servers. 
Capable PC and a copy of Counterstrike a plus. 

From: "???" (***@aol.com)
Subject: hey
what exactly is in the GR vending machine of evil?

Must you ask? We thought the title said it all.

If you're feeling a little devilish and would like to have an evil trinket to accompany you on your day of evil, then just drop a quarter into the GRVME to receive a clear, plastic sphere containing random evilness.

Current items include:

- A signed, embossed copy of The Crow: City of Angels
- Kathy-Lee Gifford
- Alf
- Industrial sized vat of Fizzy Milk
- Pokemon sound track
- Unpatched version of Giants: Citizen Kabuto
- Brian's favorite sock

Note: We are running low on The Crow, so it's become a rarity. Gotta catch 'em all!

-GR

From: "???" (***@aol.com)
Subject: Everquest
Hi GR i just wanted to know if you guys still play the 
everquest game. What race and class are you and on what 
server as well as your name? it would be cool to meet you 
guys in the game. And maby we can join in a group and fight? 
Thanks for the time please write back.

No, we do not play Everquest anymore. It was taking up too much of our lives and we were neglecting our responsibilities and our loved ones. We realized we had a problem, and as our addiction worsened the more detached we grew. We were forced to pull the plug on the whole operation in fear of losing our very lives to the madness of the disease.

Besides, we're too busy playing Counter-strike. BLAM!

-GR

From: Aaron L. Kroll (***@yahoo.com)
Subject: Video Card Question
First of all, my continued compliments on your
website. I always enjoy reading the reviews and
mailbag.
A while back, I asked you guys for recommendations for
what I should buy for a good gaming PC. I followed
your suggestions and got a system with a 733MHz
Pentium III and 192 MB of RAM. (It's a Dell Dimension
L733r, for reference.)
You also recommended that I get a GeForce2 card to
upgrade my video capabilities. I currently have the
Intel video controller mounted on my machine's
motherboard. (Sadly, it's only 4MB.) So, I searched
the web for a good deal on a GeForce2 GTS board, and
bought a 32MB one from VisionTek.
I'm all set to install the card when I discover that
my computer only has PCI expansion slots. Almost all
GeForce2 cards are AGP, including the one I bought
(and now have to return).
So, I'd like to ask your opinion once more. Should I
go with a lower-end GeForce2 MX card (from either
Creative or Inno3d), which is available in PCI form,
or try another brand? The only one I've found in PCI
form right now is the ATI All-In-Wonder 128 32MB.
To sum up this whole message in a sentence: Which
video card should I get, a GeForce2 MX or an ATI
All-In-Wonder 128?
Thanks for any guidance you can give me,
--Aaron

Wow! We feel sort of bad about not mentioning the AGP. However, it's surprising that Dell sold you a new motherboard that doesn't support AGP.

***Attention Newbies***

The GR computer suggestion in our recent Holiday Gift Guide was for building your own computer from the ground up. Gamers tend to have CPU's custom built for them, as the package deals offered by companies like Dell are often cheap and guarantee compatibility.

Generally speaking, the problem with the package deals is exactly what happened to Aaron - in order to cut down costs, Dell sold him a motherboard that offered him little room for upgrade.

The best suggestion we could give is to try and send that big Dell rig back. For gaming purposes, you are going to want to have an AGP slot as the best cards only come in AGP. If you try to change up or add to the video device on your Dell motherboard, you may run into some conflicts and incompatibilities, and chances are Dell won't be very helpful in fixing things.

If this is too much of a pain (which it very well may be), we would suggest locating an NVIDIA chipset-based PCI board, a Voodoo 5 PCI or an ATI Radeon PCI. But again, in the future most cards will be AGP.

Honestly, we know Dell has some GeForce 2 cards to place in their machines. You might try returning the Dell and impressing upon them the severity of your need to game. Perhaps they'll have a better offer.

-GR