REVIEWSThe Incredible Adventures of Van Review
Van Helsing returns to Borgovia to slay monsters and take revenge. Is the final installment of this popular ARPG series considered a worthwhile conclusion?
In all the talk of graphical downgrades no one seems much preoccupied with 'why?'. Why build something and then proceed to tear it down, piece by piece, in the hope that ever more diminished expectations about the final product won't be severe enough to...
From: ??? (***@worldnet.att.net)
How do you get game companies to send you games to play and review?
Dear Writer Incognito,
Dinner, dancing, high heels,
low-cut blouses and very short skirts. Which
Hey guys, don't forget to
shave your legs before E3. I'm not bringing any extra razors.
From: "Josh Bennet" (***@aol.com)
Subject: stop sending mail
Could you grade a Dreamcast game? Any of them? Please!?
Sure, if you could write
us an e-mail asking us to do so.
Wow! That was quick. As per
your request, we placed everything else (including sleeping, eating
and playing Counter-Strike) on hold while we painstakingly cranked out
well over 100 Dreamcast
game reviews in mere hours.
Can we help you with anything
else? If you ask kindly, maybe we'll even post some Dreamcast
Quit Yer Bitchin'!
From: "Ryan Wilkosz" (***@yahoo.com)
Subject: You thought we were annoying?
This isn't directed towards any members of your staff,
I just wrote it in hopes that your web-visitors might
Lately, on a lot of sites I have seen people
complaining about the people who work at
video/computer gaming retail stores. I understand
that we can get annoying asking you "are you
interested in the strategy guide for blah blah blah."
Well sorry, that's part of our job. You thought we
were annoying? My god, do you really think that we
want to stand there and listen to the fact that you
beat all your friends at bust-a-groove or you are one
of the super elite that me MGS in two hours? Who
cares and bull$h*t are my common mental replies.
These are the same people that come in saying "I found
out that the cheapest the Xbox is going to be is
$599.99" We don't care that you wanna date Tifa or
that your mom uses a rumble pack as a pleasure
Working at a video game store you get basically
five types of customers:
1. Actual gamers - those that respect you and talk
your ear off if need be...those that know there stuff
well enough to realize that the music from Contra is
playing in the background...The good guys and girls
2. Old people - that want a SEGA playstation, or an
INTENDO and they think just because their
grandchildren have it on their Christmas list that we
have to have it
3. Quasi-gamers - people who think because they play
Everquest and/or knows somebody with a mod-chip that
they are one of the gamming elite
4. Sports Only gamers - those who wont be happy until
at least 12 football games are released every 6 months
5. What hole did you crawl out of gamers - these
people suck...these are the people who come in with 7
kids with dirty ratty clothes on...they could buy
their family dinner but instead they are gonna spend
there paycheck on Nascar in Heat and/or Schmackdown
Basically, all I am saying is that our job is hard
enough without a bunch of fake gamers complaining
about us trying to sell them strategy guides, memory
Just a thought
We know your job is difficult,
just like ours. The industry needs retailers just like it needs reviewers.
But much of your complaining
can be construed as the high-hatted, hoity-toity holier-than-thou hardcore
gaming attitude some of you guys give off when you're talking to customers
(or writing complaints to game sites...wink, wink, nudge, nudge).
For instance, actually coming
up with the label "quasi-gamers." Last I checked, there were
people who played games and people who didn't. I suppose there are some
truly hardcore freaks running around (like us), but I didn't realize
there were so many shades in between.
We've said it before and
we'll say it again. This is the video game industry. We can't afford
to take ourselves too seriously for fear of becoming as anal-retentive
as the suits and sterile corporations that we fight so ardently to stay
From: "SPDRACR" (***@aol.com)
Subject: A+ debate
I read a lot of your reviews for games and while you have
many REVOLUTIONARY games they always get an A. Never do you
give an A+. Its actually more annoying than anything. Its
like you just wont tread into the "A+" territory.
Wipeout XL, Gran Turismo, Driver, and even Final Fantasy 7
were great games that could have gotten the A+. That's only
the playstation list too I could go on and on about Goldeneye
and many other games. What genre and level of greatness are
you looking to put that big A+ stamp on (if ever)? Maybe its
about time you give out an A+ to a game that deserves it. That's
my only real with Game Revolution besides you missing a few game
reviews but you guys are doing a GREAT job. Keep up the good work.
Make up your minds.
Score: Readers - 1, GR - 0.
From: Zachary Smith (***@msn.com)
Subject: your grading
I think u are way wrong about teh way u graded some games.
Star craft is not B- quality it deserves at least an B+.
And many other games have this problem. I'd like to c u make a game
and i'll be the one to grade it just like u graded other games.
First, allow some clarification.
We gave the original StarCraft
a B, not a B-. We gave the B- to StarCraft:
Brood War. Of course, you probably think both of these grades are
And in some ways, so do
we. Since publishing the review, we've played the game a lot more. Indeed,
it's probably a B+.
When you review games for
a living, it's tough nailing 'em all on the head. We were a little too
tough on StarCraft. We could blame the incredible workload at
that time, or the invading clans from the North, but instead, we're
just gonna blame Colin.
What grade should it get?
We don't know, because we don't need to know. It's been graded and that's
that. No changes.
P.S. Just relish the fact
that you are one up on the GR editors. Of course, now we have to kill