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GR Mailbag: Mail From Hell

Posted on Friday, June 2 @ 19:00:00 PST by Duke_Ferris
Game Promoter

From: "Newell, Jacqueline" <*******.com>
Subject:PC game review

I am trying to find out what the process is for getting a game reviewed in Game Informer. My client WildTangent, the largest online games publisher, just released Penguins! (a PC casual game) at E3. Can you help me with this?

Thanks in advance,

acqueline Newel

Dear Acqueline,

According to the fine print on the Staff page in Game Informer's June 2006 issue:

"The Editor welcomes company product information for all video games. Such materials should be addressed to: Editor Game Informer Magazine, 724 North First St., 4th Floor, Minneapolis, MN 55401."

We aren't sure why you needed us to tell you that when it's right there in the magazine, but we aren't sure how you managed to misspell your own name, either.

We feel we should tell you, though, that your casual game stands a penguin's chance in the Sahara of getting reviewed in Game Informer, because as it says further down in the fine print "Game Informer is a trademark of GameStop, Inc." In other words, they are owned by a video game retailer. That retailer wants people to come into their stores or go to their website and buy retail games. This is where Game Informer comes in - in many ways, they exist to promote GameStop's retail products. Nice.

If GameStop is not selling your game, there is no reason for Game Informer to review it. So contrary to the first quote, there is no process for getting a casual game reviewed in Game Informer.

- ame Resolution

Thanks, But No Thanks

From: "Newell, Jacqueline" <*******.com>
Subject: Re: PC game review

Sorry I meant to say I want to find out how I can get this reviewed in

Thanks for your help!

Dear Acqueline,

Like Game Informer, we only review retail products. Unlike Game Informer, we are a consumer advocate - we try to tell people what games are worth their money. Until we got your email, we assumed the biggest wastes of cash were all retail games, but after checking out WildTangent's website, it looks like the times are a-changin'!

But don't worry. We'll try to ignore games like Tornado Jockey, Polar Bowler and Snowboard SuperJam until our readers start clamoring for reviews. In the meantime, we'll let them know how to uninstall your invasive WildTangent client should they decide to check out any of your games on their own.

Thanks for writing in!

- GI, er, GR

Wii Luv Dic

From: "Joseph Weber" <***********.com>
Subject: The Nintendo...whatever the hell they're calling it now

So does this mean that Nintendo fan-boy-children everywhere will be saying:

"Hey, after school do you want to come home and play with my Dic?"
"I can't wait to play the new Zelda game on my Dic!"
"Will my DS be compatable with my Dic?"
"I can't wait to get my hands on Nintendo's new Dic!"
"That's the most expensive Dic I've ever seen."
"My mom said if I failed my math test, she'll take away my Dic."
"That Dic will look great on my new HD TV!"

Any thoughts? 

Dear Joseph,

No thoughts, no.

- GR

The Young and the Restless

From: bridget duggin <**********.com>
Subject: wondering gamer fan

Hello my name is Paul and have always been a big fan of your website.  I'm 18 years old and I'm trying to decide what to do with my life.  And I can't imagine a more cool job than playing playstion and then writing a review about every game you play.  Other than video games I enjoy writing whether it's a boaring essay or an interesting novel.  I would really like to know the steps I would have to take to become a sucsessful game critic like yourselves. And also what are the chances of doing well in the buisness. Pleeeeaaaassssseee email me back at ***  Thanks for your time.

Big Fan

Dear Wayward Youth,

Although you claim to enjoy writing boaring essays and interesting novels, we think your penchant for creative spelling and daring grammar would perfectly suit you to life in the PR business.

Just kidding! After all, Public Relations people are generally required to strangle their own inner children before they're allowed to promote games like Penguins! and at your age, that would be fatal.

As long as you continue to write novels, play games and misspell the word business, you're on the right track to work at a place like Game Revolution.

- GRn't you precious

We Just Can't Get Enough

From: daniel celvi <*********.com>
Subject: Gaming too in-depth and interactive?

So I've been looking at all of the E3 coverage on the GR site, and it seems like next-gen systems are all getting very interactive, and incredibly involved. It all seems cool and interesting that video game systems have more functions and features than my computer, but it seems too in-depth. My point is, it seems like it's getting to be too much, at least for someone like me. Yeah it's cool that all of the big gaming corporations can create a system that does everything, but is it really necessary? I like video games, but I don't want to have to be hooked up to the internet to play games, I don't want a hard-drive built into the system and have to mess around hooking it up to my computer, and I certainly don't want to have to jump around the room to play a video game. It seems like next gen systems are just going to provide new ways to insult hardcore video game nerds for being virgins rather than broaden the audience of video games. My question being, are gamers like myself going to get wiped out? Or is it because GR (and the only gaming site I read is GR so I only know about what GR writes about) generally tries to cover the newer features of video games, seeing as you can only write about better graphics and gameplay mechanics so many times?

Dear Overwhelmed daniel,

We understand your frustrated griping. As gaming technology becomes more complex, it's easy to feel left out in the cold as the early adopters camp out in lines to spend too much money on overpriced happy machines. Being outnerded just doesn't feel good.

But keep in mind, that's the nature of technology. If it didn't get more complex or more interesting, we'd still be doing math on an abacus and thinking Adventure was a deep, rewarding video game. Have at you, evil ducks dragons!

Anyway, to answer some of your questions...sites like GR focus on the new features of upcoming consoles because right now, that's all we have to go on. Until final software comes out, it's hard to comment about graphics and mechanics. Such is the nature of the preview beast.

And no, your type is not being wiped out - whatever your type is - because there are and will continue to be a billion ways to play a billion video games. Not into jumping around the room? Then don't. Not into online fragging? Play solo. Despite the odd pressure to be some sort of extreme lifestyle gamer, the vast majority of console gamers do not play games online or spend outrageous amounts of money in online marketplaces, and all those videos of Wii gamers leaping around the living room like ADD nutjobs just to play Zelda or Mario are merely marketing ploys. And in your case, they seem to be working.

We can't say it enough - don't believe the hype.

- GR

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