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DAILY MANIFESTO

GR Mailbag: Not the Meaning of Life, but close

Posted on Monday, November 13 @ 12:13:14 Eastern by Duke_Ferris
Field Trip!
From: Richard Zonneveld (****@hotmail.com)
Subject: Game-Revolution Kicks Ass
I know i am sounding a little sympathetic but i have to 
tell you guys. Game-Revolution is the shit. I have been 
using Game-Revolution since 1996. That is when i first 
started playing video games. I mainly visited your site 
for cheats, but hey that's besides the point. Not once 
did I find a game that didnt contain the cheats that 
elaborated video gaming and made it a little more 
humerous and entertaining. I use to visit 
Game-Revolution every single computers class the i 
attended during my high school career. And my computer 
teacher hated me for that becuase i would never do my 
work. Thanks for gettin me in trouble. I loved pissing 
him off. 
So, hats off to the employees of Game-Revolution 
and especially the guys that have been a part of the 
website since the beginning.
Game-Revolution: Best Site on the net....(by my opinion)
P.S.
I hope you guys put me in your mailbag.
Counter-Strike Kicks Ass.....[!@#$]Mr.Pink is me.
I hope this letter is not to long
Hi Richard,

Thanks for the kind words! And we didn't even have to threaten you.

However, we don't like pissing off teachers. So to be fair, we've concoted a permission slip for our readers to show their teachers the next time this situation comes up:

Dear Mr./Ms./Mrs/Senor/Senorita ________,

Please excuse ________ f rom paying attention in class today, because he/she/it is a "geek." Please understand that this is not a life choice, but rather an affliction that cannot be denied or understood. Failure to allow this "geek" to read our magazine may have dire consequences, like inadvertant d20 rolling or excessive Dr. Who references.

Sincerely,

GR Staff

We swear this will work. Really.
From: "CheesPoofMan" (********@davesworld.net)
Subject: Hi
Give me cheese poofs! I don't want no stinkin' PMS2!
I want cheese poofs! Have a contest for chees poofs! 
Anything! JUST GET ME CHEESE POOFS, or 
the PS2 gets it! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-CheesPoofMan
Hello CheesPoofMan,

PMS2? Hmmm...now there's a good idea for a contest...though we'd only be able to run it once a month, eh?

As for those Cheese Poofs, would you settle for some organic, unsalted, baked-dried potato skins? That's all we can get in Berkeley.

-GR

Tasty Savior of the Universe
From: Upendra Pai (****@pathcom.com)
Subject: ???
Hi
I was just wondering, in your PS2 competition, who won 
the single dried bean, possibly a magic one? If no one 
did, I'll gladly take it!!!
Hi Upendra,

No one won the bean. With great power comes great responsiblity, young grasshopper. The magic bean is not to be trifled with, and the second place winner didn't have the stamina or strength of character to deal with what is perhaps the single most impressive legume the world has ever known.

So instead, we put it in Duke's famous West Coast chili...or should I say, Duke's famous MAGIC West Coast chili.

-GR

The Wars Continue!
From: "???" (*****@aol.com)
Subject: The PS2 (a little glitch)
Did PS2's release into the united states fix the little 
problem of not enough memory?
Whos graphics do you think are better after the american 
release of ps2 is DC better or is the new ps2s graphics 
better now? Another question is is 300$ bucks a bargain 
for the PS2 or a ripoff? P.S I heard you might as welll 
bye a computer than the "x box" because the x box is so 
complicated. Whats the real deal on that?
Hey Mr. Anonymous,

Not enough memory? No, the Playstation 2 does not have Alzheimer's. It will remember your name (provided you can get it to speak.)

The fact of the matter is that the PS2 still contains a mere 4 MB of Video RAM. However, it's really up to the developers to get around this small issue. Most of the developers we've spoken with feel that the issue is blown out of proportion and that it just takes time to get used to a new system.

Are they full of it? We don't know, though we will soon enough as more games come out for the console.

-GR

P.S. Whoever told you that you should go spend 1000 dollars on a new computer because the Xbox is "too complicated" should go back to their job as an assistant ditchdigger, since that's about all their small brain can handle.

Nerf - The Other White Meat.
From: (*******@msn.com)
Subject: We must put down all resistance
These people who write to you and complain about the mail bag 
are morons. Don't let a bunch of nerf-herder's stop the 
revolution. Viva La Revolucion! Viva La Resistance! 
"I can out drink anyone anywhere at anytime. And if I can't 
they can drive me home"-Dimebag Darrel
Hello Darrel,

No nerfherder can stop the Revolution. And for actually calling someone a "nerfherder," we hereby promote you to the status of Smuggler, just like Han Solo.

So does that make us "nerdherders?"

-GR

Tags:   gr mailbag


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