Update: I was unfortunately not aware of Shamus Young's severe criticism of Fallout 3 available here to link in the original piece and I regret that. It dovetails rather nicely with what I've written and it's much better executed than my piece. I strongly recommend anyone...
From: Richard Zonneveld (****@hotmail.com)
Subject: Game-Revolution Kicks Ass
I know i am sounding a little sympathetic but i have to
tell you guys. Game-Revolution is the shit. I have been
using Game-Revolution since 1996. That is when i first
started playing video games. I mainly visited your site
for cheats, but hey that's besides the point. Not once
did I find a game that didnt contain the cheats that
elaborated video gaming and made it a little more
humerous and entertaining. I use to visit
Game-Revolution every single computers class the i
attended during my high school career. And my computer
teacher hated me for that becuase i would never do my
work. Thanks for gettin me in trouble. I loved pissing
So, hats off to the employees of Game-Revolution
and especially the guys that have been a part of the
website since the beginning.
Game-Revolution: Best Site on the net....(by my opinion)
I hope you guys put me in your mailbag.
Counter-Strike Kicks Ass.....[!@#$]Mr.Pink is me.
I hope this letter is not to long
Thanks for the kind words!
And we didn't even have to threaten you.
However, we don't like pissing
off teachers. So to be fair, we've concoted a permission slip for our
readers to show their teachers the next time this situation comes up:
Dear Mr./Ms./Mrs/Senor/Senorita ________,
Please excuse ________ f rom paying attention
in class today, because he/she/it is a "geek." Please
understand that this is not a life choice, but rather an affliction
that cannot be denied or understood. Failure to allow this "geek"
to read our magazine may have dire consequences, like inadvertant
d20 rolling or excessive Dr. Who references.
We swear this will work. Really.
From: "CheesPoofMan" (********@davesworld.net)
Give me cheese poofs! I don't want no stinkin' PMS2!
I want cheese poofs! Have a contest for chees poofs!
Anything! JUST GET ME CHEESE POOFS, or
the PS2 gets it! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PMS2? Hmmm...now there's
a good idea for a contest...though we'd only be able to run it once
a month, eh?
As for those Cheese Poofs,
would you settle for some organic, unsalted, baked-dried potato skins?
That's all we can get
Tasty Savior of the Universe
From: Upendra Pai (****@pathcom.com)
I was just wondering, in your PS2 competition, who won
the single dried bean, possibly a magic one? If no one
did, I'll gladly take it!!!
No one won the bean. With
great power comes great responsiblity, young grasshopper. The magic
bean is not to be trifled with, and the second place winner didn't have
the stamina or strength of character to deal with what is perhaps the
single most impressive legume the world has ever known.
So instead, we put it in
Duke's famous West Coast chili...or should I say, Duke's famous MAGIC
West Coast chili.
The Wars Continue!
From: "???" (*****@aol.com)
Subject: The PS2 (a little glitch)
Did PS2's release into the united states fix the little
problem of not enough memory?
Whos graphics do you think are better after the american
release of ps2 is DC better or is the new ps2s graphics
better now? Another question is is 300$ bucks a bargain
for the PS2 or a ripoff? P.S I heard you might as welll
bye a computer than the "x box" because the x box is so
complicated. Whats the real deal on that?
Hey Mr. Anonymous,
Not enough memory? No,
the Playstation 2 does not have Alzheimer's. It will remember your name
(provided you can get it to speak.)
The fact of the matter is
that the PS2 still contains a mere 4 MB of Video RAM. However, it's
really up to the developers to get around this small issue. Most of
the developers we've spoken with feel that the issue is blown out of
proportion and that it just takes time to get used to a new system.
Are they full of it? We don't
know, though we will soon enough as more games come out for the console.
P.S. Whoever told you that
you should go spend 1000 dollars on a new computer because the Xbox
is "too complicated" should go back to their job as an assistant
ditchdigger, since that's about all their small brain can handle.
Nerf - The Other White Meat.
Subject: We must put down all resistance
These people who write to you and complain about the mail bag
are morons. Don't let a bunch of nerf-herder's stop the
revolution. Viva La Revolucion! Viva La Resistance!
"I can out drink anyone anywhere at anytime. And if I can't
they can drive me home"-Dimebag Darrel
No nerfherder can stop the Revolution. And for actually calling someone
a "nerfherder," we hereby promote you to the status of Smuggler,
just like Han Solo.