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FEATURED VOXPOP nick_olsen
Welcome home, Mario; we’ve missed you!
By nick_olsen
Posted on 05/13/13
[ Editor's Note: As Nick Olsen is a writer for Theory of Gaming, this won't be counted in the monthly Vox Pop prize. However, it is very much a worthy read. ] By Nick Olsen Co-founder, Theory of Gaming In 1985 Nintendo started a revolution when it...

Home Manifesto Here's Me Shouting At Stuff

DAILY MANIFESTO

Here's Me Shouting At Stuff

Posted on Sunday, April 1 @ 13:00:00 Eastern by tinymhg

Why would you play with one of these things? Isn't it confusing enough that the buttons are shapes? Who said buttons could be shapes?! I didn't! I don't want shapes for buttons or buttons for shapes or anything! Please! I'm hungry! I haven't eaten since breakfast! I'm lonely and these things confuse me! Why do you want me to be confused! Can I call my family?


It was 1923 when I first learned what a Mario and a Bowser was. I couldn't imagine a stupider thing to spend your dollar pennies on, dollar pennies being the style back in those days. Still it was what you did for each other, whether you were a tall man or a short man or a... what? What are you talking about? NO! I don't know you!


Small things, mostly, like thimballs, dried beans, grains of sand. The other part is for things that no one can ever know about me: that I'm mostly, hugely, green. Don't tell anyone that! I'm not going back to the home! I like it here with my family! Why do you need to put me away?!
Tags:   Community


Comments
  • cyberjim2000
    cyberjim2000
    Joined: Feb 2010
    Posted: Apr 1st, 2012 at 1:20 pm
    Grandpa Tiny, tell us about the Great War.
    0 2
  • tinymhg
    tinymhg
    Joined: Jun 2011
    Posted: Apr 1st, 2012 at 1:47 pm
    I don't remember writing this.
    0 6
  • Anthony_Severino
    Anthony_Severino
    Joined: Oct 2010
    Posted: Apr 1st, 2012 at 2:17 pm
    Do you know where you are, sir? Is there anyone we can call that can take you home?
    0 2
  • UghRochester
    UghRochester
    Joined: Jun 2006
    Posted: Apr 1st, 2012 at 4:44 pm
    I'll take care of him. He's seeing the reality for the first time. He's been blind all these years from the truth.
    0 0
  • tinymhg
    tinymhg
    Joined: Jun 2011
    Posted: Apr 1st, 2012 at 4:54 pm
    But I don't want to live in Pennsylvania.
    0 1
  • UghRochester
    UghRochester
    Joined: Jun 2006
    Posted: Apr 2nd, 2012 at 4:51 am
    Tiny, you haven't "live," yet,
    0 0
  • OdiousLupous
    OdiousLupous
    Joined: Jul 2011
    Posted: Apr 1st, 2012 at 7:34 pm
    Get this man 15cc's of haiku stat!
    0 2
  • StinksMockarina
    StinksMockarina
    Joined: Mar 2012
    Posted: Apr 1st, 2012 at 1:49 pm
    Oh no! He's worse than we thought. We'll get you the help you need, old friend.
    0 2
  • Heath_Hindman
    Heath_Hindman
    Joined: May 2011
    Posted: Apr 2nd, 2012 at 6:17 am
    I wore an onion on my belt, as was the style at the time.
    0 2
  • tinymhg
    tinymhg
    Joined: Jun 2011
    Posted: Apr 2nd, 2012 at 10:10 am
    ... what? What are you talking about? NO! I don't know you!
    0 1
  • Klandathu
    Klandathu
    Joined: Apr 2008
    Posted: Apr 3rd, 2012 at 8:28 pm
    Tiny used to be with it, but then they changed what "it" was. Now what he's with isn't "it," and what "it" is seems strange and scary to him.
    0 0

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