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I'm Not Lovin' It

Posted on Tuesday, November 15 @ 18:38:22 PST by Ben_Silverman
The more I think about Nintendo's deal with McDonald's, the more my stomach starts to do things that usually only happen to me after eating at McDonald's.

In case you missed it, I'm talking about the partnership between the two mega-corporations that turns 6,000 McDonald's restaurants into free access points for Nintendo's newly launched Wi-Fi gaming service. The theory is that a kid without access to wireless Internet can now go to McDonald's, turn on his DS and be playing the world in Mario Kart DS within seconds.

Provided, that is, the diabetic little bastard can squeeze his fat ass through the door. Can I get a triple-bypass with that shake?

Okay, maybe I've watched too much Supersize Me and maybe I've read too much Fast Food Nation, but does anyone else find it unbelievably weird that Nintendo, the industry's self-appointed advocate of kid-friendly gaming, would encourage their young, able-bodied consumers to hang out at what by all accounts is the worst restaurant in the world for them? What about a deal with Tower Records? Jamba Juice? Hell, even Subway gives a crap about your cholesterol.

I know this sounds alarmist, but I cannot stop picturing some chunky little kid sucking down fries for three hours while glued to a touch screen. That's a scary combo. My heart goes out to the parents, although good luck finding an actual donor when your kid's aorta pops like a grape. And if you think I'm being harsh, just remember that the company actually created a character named "Grimace."

Tags:   Nintendo

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