More Reviews
REVIEWS Pillars of Eternity Review
Obsidian Entertainment creates a retro Infinity Engine RPG funded by Kickstarter. Is it as good as previous Infinity Engine games, or does the novelty quickly wear off?

Game of Thrones: Episode 3 - "Th Review
Either you win or you die... or you just stay the same.
More Previews
PREVIEWS Final Fantasy: Record Keeper Preview
The official Final Fantasy 2D sprite-based demake I never knew I wanted.

LATEST FEATURES 9 of the Best Indies at PAX East 2015
Indie gallery alert! We're featuring the likes of Titan Souls, Pollen, NOCT, and We Happy Few.

Evolve's New Behemoth Is Terrifying
Behemoth is bigger than your average Evolve monster, but he sure knows how to roll quickly.
MOST POPULAR FEATURES Top 50 Pokémon of All Time
Can you believe there are now six generations of Pokémon? Six!! That's a crazy amount of different creatures to collect. But which are the cream of the crop? Don't worry, Magikarp isn't actually one of them.

LEADERBOARD
Read More Member Blogs
FEATURED VOXPOP shandog137
The perils of the Hype Train…
By shandog137
Posted on 03/09/15
The recent release of Evolve and The Order 1886 really got me to thinking about the disparity between the perspective of sales-driven publishers and the quality-driven purchases of consumers. The “Hype Train” is nothing new, but the way it is utilized has been creating far more...

DAILY MANIFESTO

Shortest...Resolution...Ever.

Posted on Friday, January 6 @ 16:18:28 Eastern by Ben_Silverman
And just like that, the Toilet Boll flushes again.

I'm of course referring to director/sworn enemy of taste Uwe Boll's latest turd, his film adaptation of the cheesy vampire video game Bloodrayne, which came out today despite the fact that no one but the crew's family members (and GR's own Joe Dodson) will see it. Not only does this shameful waste of perfectly good film reel kick the video game industry in its nuts by focusing on tits instead of talent, but disproves the existence of God since gamers everywhere have been praying it wouldn't see the light of day.

Why so bitter? Because last week, I made a resolution to stop hating on Uwe Boll and start embracing his bizarre, misguided love of turning games into films because...I don't know, because it seemed like a good challenge. Yeah, I was drunk and high on glue, but still, it was a resolution, and if Oprah takes those things seriously, so should I.

Except after sobering up a little, I realized that the usually not-terrible Ben Kingsley is in the film, and I love Ben Kingsley. For crying out loud, the dude is a knight. But apparently even knights are hard up for cash these days and Uwe's got an infinite line of credit at the German Bank of Bad F*cking Ideas. Yeah, that's right - in my heart, Uwe killed Gandhi.

So thanks, Toilet Boll, for helping me set the record for the shortest New Year's video game resolution since the time I tried to quit making fun of Nintendo fanboys. That one only lasted an hour.



comments powered by Disqus

More On GameRevolution