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FEATURED VOXPOP whytenoiz ~~        When I was eleven years old, it was a very good year, and I can remember my daily routine vividly. These were the years before I owned a Sony Playstation, and I used to venture to my friends house - everyday after school - to watch him play through Final...

DAILY MANIFESTO

Wii Fit Fall ==> Sex Addict?

Posted on Thursday, April 15 @ 17:27:49 Eastern by
And falling from a Tony Hawk Ride skateboard makes you celibate.

24-year-old catering worker "Randy" Amanda Flowers claims, in the British The Daily Star (read: it's a tabloid), that she is now a sex addict due to falling off a Wii Fit balance board. A doctor calls it "persistent sexual arousal syndrome". Amanda calls it "ten sex sessions a day". I call it "being way too horny".

"It began as a twinge down below before surging through my body," Ms. Flowers exclaims. "Sometimes it built up into a trembling orgasm." Anything that vibrates - mobile phones, food processors, message chairs, lawnmowers, Xbox 360 controllers, naked dogs in winter - apparently turns her on.

"With no cure I just have to try to control my passion by breathing deeply. Hopefully one day I'll find a superstud who can satisfy me."

Now to be fair, the doctor does say that her disorder comes from a damaged nerve... or a whole bunch of them.





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