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FEATURED VOXPOP oblivion437     In all the talk of graphical downgrades no one seems much preoccupied with 'why?'.  Why build something and then proceed to tear it down, piece by piece, in the hope that ever more diminished expectations about the final product won't be severe enough to...

DAILY MANIFESTO

Wii Fit Fall ==> Sex Addict?

Posted on Thursday, April 15 @ 17:27:49 Eastern by
And falling from a Tony Hawk Ride skateboard makes you celibate.

24-year-old catering worker "Randy" Amanda Flowers claims, in the British The Daily Star (read: it's a tabloid), that she is now a sex addict due to falling off a Wii Fit balance board. A doctor calls it "persistent sexual arousal syndrome". Amanda calls it "ten sex sessions a day". I call it "being way too horny".

"It began as a twinge down below before surging through my body," Ms. Flowers exclaims. "Sometimes it built up into a trembling orgasm." Anything that vibrates - mobile phones, food processors, message chairs, lawnmowers, Xbox 360 controllers, naked dogs in winter - apparently turns her on.

"With no cure I just have to try to control my passion by breathing deeply. Hopefully one day I'll find a superstud who can satisfy me."

Now to be fair, the doctor does say that her disorder comes from a damaged nerve... or a whole bunch of them.





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