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DAILY MANIFESTO

Wii Have A Murder Weapon

Posted on Friday, February 6 @ 14:03:53 PST by Duke_Ferris
Austin, Texas: An argument over some Girl Scout cookies apparently led a man to try and strangle his girlfriend with the Wiimote and Nunchuck cord. Which makes it the first ever garrote simulator.

I mean, we've seen some violence from the Wiimote before, mostly against HDTV's and overhead light fixtures. One woman also briefly killed her annoying yappy dog with it. However this is new.

Christina Alvarado told Austin police that she woke up her boyfriend, Daniel Alvarez, 21, Monday morning after discovering her cookies were gone, according to the affidavit.

The two struggled until they ended up in the living room, where Alvarez grabbed a Wii controller, according to the affidavit. He put his knees on her chest to pin her down and strangled her with the cord of the video game controller, according to the affidavit.

Alvarado was able to free herself and call 911. Alvarez fled the home but was arrested soon after, according to the affidavit. Alvarado had a faint mark from a cord around her neck, shortness of breath, trouble speaking and was coughing when police arrived, the affidavit said.


Personally, I blame the cookies. No wait, I blame the Girl Scouts. No! It must be the video games. Eidos, you really need to make a Wii Hitman game using Daniel's new control scheme.





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