More Reviews
REVIEWS Boss! Review
PlayStation Vita owners looking to exercise a little frustration can look to this rather low-fi title about creating a monster and destroying everything in your path.

KINGDOM HEARTS HD 2.5 ReMIX Review
Part 2 of Square-Enix and Disney's cooperative compilation cash-cow is ready to milk the series for another go, but does the milk taste sweet or is it spoiled?
More Previews
PREVIEWS Evolve Preview
With multiplayer action set as its focus, Evolve surprised us earlier this month by introducing a single-player campaign mode where you can switch between mercenaries.
Release Dates
NEW RELEASES Kalimba
Release date: Out Now

Persona 5
Release date: 12/31/14

Motorcycle Club
Release date: 01/01/15

Atelier Ayesha Plus: The Alchemist of Dusk
Release date: 01/14/15


LATEST FEATURES Downloadable Content Walks the Line Between Fun and Frenzied in Middle-earth
I don’t even care all that much for the Lords of the Rings brand, which makes the content falling under Shadow of Mordor’s Season Pass a pleasant surprise.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters for Gamers
If this awful trend is going to persist, you may as well do it your way.

LEADERBOARD
Read More Member Blogs
FEATURED VOXPOP KevinS
RIP Ralph Baer (1922-2014)
By KevinS
Posted on 12/07/14
RIP Ralph Baer (1922-2014) I really, really hate writing obits. I really do. But I take it as a personal honor to be able to say good things about the men and women I respect, whether in this industry or just in my life, and Ralph Baer is the reason all of this exists in the first...

DAILY MANIFESTO

Xbox Gamers Are Better Lovers, Says Study

Posted on Thursday, April 4 @ 15:52:47 Eastern by

According to a new study polling partners of gamers about their sexual prowess and platform of choice, Xbox gamers are the best in the sack.

Out of 1,747 sexual partners of UK gamers polled, 11% of gamers were rated as "excellent" lovers, 27% were considered "good", 26% "average", and 20% were shamed with a rating of "below average". Ouch. Nothing hurts those feels than being called "below average" anything, nevermind your love-making skills.

Out of these poll questions, Xbox gamers actually ranked the highest with the largest percentage of "good" lovers, at 54%, and 22% being called "excellent". Imagine? Every time some punk is raging on Xbox LIVE about how he fucked your mother, it means your mother would probably have the best time she's had since you were conceived.


Wii gamers fared well, with 47% of the voting in their favor being "good" or higher. Probably because Wii gamers are skilled with toys, and incredibly fit from all that Wii Fit and exercise games. Plus, all that shaking the Wiimote results in supreme masturabatory skills, and with practice comes prolongment. 

Sadly PC gamers are pathetic in bed, according to their partner's ratings in this poll. A mere 8% were considered "good", and even less, an absolutely pitiful 3% were called "excellent". So much for being the Master Race. Your disk drive must be too floppy, and I know you never get your USB stick inserted correctly on the first (or second) try. C'mon, now.

PS3 gamers sadly aren't specifically mentioned, which could either mean that they we're somewhere in the middle, or it's because we left our partners speechless after the pounding we gave them, and they were unable to vote. Or more realistically, everyone is still updating their firmware.

What does this all mean? Probably nothing. I mean, how many of you are really getting laid anyway? Thought so. It also means, gamers, that it's time to level up your skills through some serious grinding.
FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER. YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO.


comments powered by Disqus