The only thing that stops the dust is the rain. It’s a sweet reprieve, but there is no middle ground. The land is either as dry as the Betty Ford clinic, or as wet as the ocean floor. Everything can be seen from the ridge overlooking Armadillo as John Marston gently bounces along atop...
After 9 years, that nasty squirrel still awesome.
WARNING! READING THIS REVIEW MEANS SPOILERS! Though everybody finished it by now.
In 2001, Nintendo released it's first real adult game. Nintendo was always afraid to do adult swims until they got the guts to release it - and that game is Conker: Bad Fur Day.
True, now you can play your Wii in a bloody game like Madworld or No More Heros and think they are fine about it, but until 2001 I think I haven't really saw a lot of blood out there.
Story Let me tell you the truth: I didn't really got BFD's story until 2009, I think, when my mind got it. That's right - you need to be at the right age. I played it at my friend's house when I was just 10, I think. But basicly the story is an enemy of Conker finally finds him and want to destroy him, of course.
For Nintendo 64, It's pretty much awesome, kinda like Banjo's but I won't say PERFECT. The reason why is because some animations are too slow and the lip syncing is awful, but I'd say it's epic and awesome.
This is going to be long. There's so much to do! As a matter of fact, you can explore as much as you wish. In order to finish the game you'll need to bash through 9 chapters including War, Toilet humor etc. This is basicly a Platformer/RPG kind game. Like Banjo, Super Mario 64, Super Mario Galaxy and stuff like that. Unlike Banjo, You don't need to mess around with witty combinations, you just have moving, jumping, copter (Something like the bee suit in Mario Galaxy...) and action button, that you activate by going to a B-pad, which I'll come back to it later.
The game itself "laughs" at movies, like Matrix, South Park and Saving Private Ryan but it's comes late in the game. As a matter of fact, the whole dialog is ripping of South Park, as it using punchlines and stuff like that to make you laugh. And this made me laugh... In these years.
Boss Battles are epic and like basiclly every game, you need to use everything you "learned" from the chapter to beat the bosses. Nintendo knows how to combine Brain with Skill whatever game it is, and this is what making this so great - to think what to do and do it. You use stuff called B-pads to do something, mostly to kill bosses. This allows you to throw missles, shoot and even throw toilet paper.
You can also pick your favourite chapter, cool enough, huh? Now I can fight the Great Mighty Poo as I like.
Well, this is one of the only games that I found that has 100% Voice acting and not bashing throw lines and lines of text like in the Paper Mario series. As a matter of fact I think the only game that had full voice acting (As I know ) is Super Mario Sunshine. The voices matches perfectly to their character. That means you won't gonna hear a chipnuck voice to a giant, fat boss. The script is just brilliant. When I was firstly playing that I didn't really got anything but from that my brain got a lot dirtier. Yeah, you'll learn a lot of swear words outta it so be careful. But really it's just a funny script that reminds South Park.
Control You won't gonna get any combinations that you need to remember in order to continue. It's just the basics of Moving, Jumping and B-pads. Sure, as you get through chapters you'll learn more stuff but these "stuff" are mostly for the chapter only, so you don't need to bust your brain cells in order to know how to continue, a think that I liked a lot. The controls worked perfect to me.
Replay In order to complite 100% you need to move around and found the secrets around every chapter. That comes from hidden money to a secret bee in the first Chapters. If you just like to explore or just want to be a man and do a huge speedrun go ahead. To be honest I'm toughing it only if friends come over and we don't fell playing Rock Band. Sure, I am going around the chapters and kicking the little girl's butt and hearing the funny dialogs but that's all.
Overall and final grade If you like violance, parodies on movies and rude talking this is for you. Put in mind that your head will get a lot dirtier but it worth it because of the funny dialogs and great multiplayer. If you have a good understanding you may follow the story because the order of the events is complitly random.
Final Grade: A+