| Playstation Review |  by Joe |
||
| Category | Sports | ||
| Players | 2 | ||
| Difficulty | Hard | ||
| Review Date | 11/00 | ||
| Publisher | 989 Sports | ||
Now imagine a somewhat less exciting snowboarder, who we'll call Cal Borden.
Cal is, perhaps, a little overweight, and maybe a little dull. He can bust a
couple cool tricks (he's been at it for long enough) and with all the latest
in trendy snowboard wear. But he just doesn't look as sharp as he used to. 
Now, if you were going to base a snowboarding game on one of these two rippers, which one would it be? Too bad it really doesn't matter who you choose, because Cal is your only option. The game I speak of is Cool Boarders 2001. It's not really a bad game, it's just over-the-hill.
The Cool Boarders story is non-existent and the characters are inconsequential. If you watch snowboarding on TV and have a favorite boarder, then you'd probably dig being able to shred some slopes in their boots. But while playing CB 2001, you feel about as close to your character as you would to a cardboard cut-out of them.
Like many other games, progress is made one step at a time by beating levels. Once you beat a level you get to challenge a real-life, superficial representation of a pro! If you beat them, you even get their board! That looks just like yours! Which does absolutely nothing special! Wow! Talk about brand-name mania.
CB 2001's graphics are a pretty standard fare, though te animations are occasionally pretty good. You can really see this when you do tricks, because your boarder will go through all the necessary motions as opposed to magically snapping into a new position. Thank you, motion capture gods, I am a happy man.
The falls rock, too. You can really jack your guy up with the wrong moves. Too bad there isn't a "Fatal Injury" or "Hospital Bill" mode, since the falls have got to be the best part of the game. It's a kick to launch your boarder off a huge jump and only do half a back-flip. Then just sit back and watch the damage commence. Those little stick arms won't save him now, mwahahaha!
It really is a shame that there are no injuries. Even though the falls are pretty sweet, your dude just bounces right back up. How about a twisted ankle or a shattered knee?
The sound is right on par with any other Playstation game. The music sounds like that same old, cheesy WWF style rock and roll that can be found in most PSX titles. It isn't very inspiring, but I guess if there was some really thumpin', adrenaline pumpin' music, you'd just wind up feeling let down by the slow and sloppy gameplay.
Yup, the gameplay is weak. CB 2001 puts all its emphasis on air-borne
tricks and grinding, both of which get old as soon as you figure out how to
do them. Grinding and punching are all that's new to the game in the way of
control, and both are very disappointing. 
The grinding is mainly implemented in the "trick sequences" to rack up mondo points. The thing is, the sequence usually involves making a huge, blind jump and landing on a tiny little rail. Actually, grinding the rail is a cinch - all you've got to do is hold down the Triangle button. However, actually hitting the one spot out of hundreds that will land you on the rail is absolutely impossible to do with any consistency. This sort of BS is the stuff that ruins the game. It's just not worth sitting around for an hour trying to hit two of these jumps in a row in order to go to the next level and have to hit three of the damn things.
The punching is barely worth mentioning. You can punch other boarders. That's it. You can't even hurt anybody with these weak and ineffectual blows, although your adversaries do yell in surprise when you poke them. I think pepper spray would have been a much better choice, especially in multiplayer mode, which is also pretty boring.
The only thing in Cool Boarders that could possibly be more frustrating than the ridiculous trick sequences is the inadequacy of the camera. The stupid thing is a nemesis. When you get up after a fall it sits about 4 feet directly above your head, giving you no indication of which way you need to go next. Your character doesn't help either, since he'll just take off in a random direction, even if it's the wrong one.
Setting these two major bitches aside, the play is still only marginally fun. If you aren't hitting trick sequences, you're probably making really big jumps. The big jumps are cool, because there are literally thousands of different aerial combinations your boarder can perform. But none of the combos are very deep.
Finally, the game isn't fast enough. TV shows focus on the jumps because they look cool, but speed is what draws snowboarders to the sport, and speed is what snowboarding excitement is all about. Granted, this game does contain a few jaunty moments, but even the races based on fastest times are easily won by playing conservatively.
Cool Boarders 2001 is another mediocre game and, at times, a pain. However, it does have some cool moments and will easily consume a couple of free hours. As a rental this game is good for a night's worth of entertainment, but as a purchase, this game is good for maybe a broken controller and a wasted 50 bucks.
| Revolution Report Card |
| C- |
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+ Cool falls |