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Conkers Preview

Johnny_Liu By:
GENRE Platform/Adventure 

One disturbed squirrel.

Perhaps you've heard of Conker. Maybe even gazed at a screenshot or two. There he was - an unassuming, Disney-esque, little orange squirrel with a wide grin across his face. But somewhere along the line, at some terrifying moment in this game's development, everything changed.

When I saw the original Conker, I thought it just looked like another cutesy-poo 3D exploring game. Alas, times have changed. Conker's Bad Fur Day has evolved into a game with a well-deserved M rating. Blood, guts, language, and 'scandalicious' innuendo. Sound tasty?

Conker has had a crazy night of drinking and partying. Tequila ... women of questionable virtue... the whole shebang, I'm sure. So he wakes up with a killer hangover, and finds himself in a strange, different world where everyone and everything is trying to kill him. Heeey... sounds like my life... sort of.

BFD is an action game in the tradition of Donkey Kong 64 and Banjo Kazooie. Different maneuvers and skills allow you to re-explore and discover new areas and secrets. Expect mini-games mixed in and different objectives to complete.

Despite the familiar gameplay, everything has been given an adult twist. Two flaming baddies walk up with plans to destroy you. What do you do? Piss all over them. That's right. Piss all over them. If the piss button is labeled number 1, then I wonder what button number 2 does? (I didn't just read that. - Ed.)

Speaking of the number two, there really are only two ways Conker's BFD can turn out. The unfortunate road would be a journey through ho-hum gameplay and forced comedy routines. But from what I've seen, expect the path of proven Rare gameplay blended with genuine humor and fun.

Maybe this will even be the first of many worthwhile mature Nintendo games. How about Mario Bachelor Party?

Sickos rejoice! Conker's Bad Fur Day is coming out December 4 for the N64.

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