Treasure Planet: Battle at Procyon Review

Avast, ye space lubbers!

Arrr....wait just a weee bit. How old are ye, me lad? WHAT? Aye, ye be big for yer age. Ye must be drinkin' MILK! Still, I be thinking ye aren't quite ready for the story of the three oarsmen just yet.

That tale is not for young ears, but I got a game that might be matchin' the cut of your jib. It be a salty space adventure in Treasure Planet Battle at Procyon, a real-time strategy game fit for the youngest of scrappers.

After the right hearty events of the movie Treasure Planet, young Jim Hawkins is studyin' to be part of the Imperial Navy. Arrr! The do-gooder! But thar be trouble a-brewin' out in the murky depths of space. As a young lieutenant, Hawkins must command a growing fleet to fight off the scallywags and unmask the dread nasties. Just like me old pal Bluebeard, but without the chatty parrot.

Ye be havin' a variety of ships, right colorful with sails, from clippers to cutters. Ye outfit yer boats with some mangy crew and weapons, though ye can't be building bigger ones. Ye also can't be building ports or plunderin' land; it's just you and the ships. And forget the wheel - pointin' and clickin' be yer main navigation system. Adjust your ship to different speeds, as they be circling around your enemies - the slower the pacin', the more the maneuverability.

The action takes place on a flat 2D playin' surface, though it be lookin' like the expanses o' space. It makes sense, for ye see, the world be flat! And if ye tell me otherwise, I'll jab out yer eyes with me fork.

As ye be forgin' ahead through the 12 missions, the game will point out the directions yer ships must be steered to. Aye, it be a right easy game as it holds your hand like ye were a wee baby boy, whether ye be off to rescue a comrade or after men of the sweet trade. Thar be a good variety of missions, but ye won't have much trouble with any o' them.

When yer ship meets up with a villainous affront, ye attack with a range of weapons, from the faster, weaker cannons to the slower, stronger torpedoes. Ye best figure out where yer guns be right quick, else ye might find yer guns facin' the wrong way. Spittin' into the wind might be good for those long trips when ye be without a bath, but shootin' into the wind be a sure way to wind up in Davey Jones' locker.

Thar also be a multiplayer mode against ye mateys on the LAN or the scourges of the Internet. Again, it be a simple affair, but if ye be playin' with an even sport, the action be okay in my book.

While the graphics be a bright and colorful lot, things be a mite dull up there in outer space. Thar be animated objects like flutterin' flags and windmills, but you won't find much life in the deep black sea. Where are the scurvy little buggers going about on their business? A pirate is only as mighty as his plunder, yet there be slim pickins out there in that space wasteland.

Them voice actors is good for the ears and adds some spicy rum to the meal. The melodies be tuneful and the roars of shots and fires be a start to the senses.

Yar, Treasure Planet be a good RTS for beginners. As ye control yer empty boats with invisible crews, the constant narrative keep the game moving along right heartily. This be a game for the little Treasure Planet fanatic, but the veteran captains might be findin' it too small a vessel to chase. Now, if ye don't be mindin' me, I best be takin' my leave to load the gunwales and crack Jenny's tea cup. Arrrrrr!