These Smash Bros. Ultimate Beefs Will Have You Throwing Controllers

Now that we’ve gotten over our ooh-ing and aah-ing over the roster for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate on Switch, it’s time to theorycraft. As Nintendo fans, it’s time to hypothesize (and fantasize) over our dream match-ups. It’s almost certain that everyone from every Smash roster is going to be there, so we know what that means – it will be one hell of a brawl. Take a look at our list of heavy-hitters that will be bursting onto a Nintendo Switch screen near you.

5. Fox McCloud versus Falco Lombardi

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If you’ve so much as sniffed at a tier list for Smash Melee, you’ll be familiar with Fox. Soon to be part of the (aptly named) Starlink title, he’s a mainstay here in Nintendo’s fighting stable. Falco is his friendly rival, and we all know how animes turn friendly rivalries into hot-blooded friendships. The chemistry of these pilots is undeniable, and they’re both top-tier Melee picks because of their versatile movesets. Unless they receive some truly spectacular nerfs, they’ll be perched on top of the roster pyramid once more. These two will fight paw and claw to get to the top, so if you’re serious about Smash Switch then you’ll see a lot of them.

4. Pikachu versus Jigglypuff

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It’s time for some Poké-on-Poké action. These two are almost neck and chubby neck in the Melee tier list, and they’re just so darn cute. We saw our fair share of familiar Pokémon faces in the E3 trailer, and while it’s nice that we’ve got a bit more variety now, Pikachu and Jigglypuff are an iconic presence. There have been some famous competitive match-ups with the two over the years, and they’re a hot pick with pros. We don’t think that’s going to change any time soon. The two have had it out for each other since Jigglypuff took a Sharpie to Ash and his Pokésquad, so there’s clearly bad blood here that’ll make for an exciting deathmatch.

3. Kirby versus Solid Snake

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We’ve seen some complaining about Solid Snake’s noticeably smaller derriere. However, he’s still got friends in all the right places. For example, he’s got Kirby, who’s a mouth on legs. Kirby is literally and metaphorically one of the most well-rounded fighters on the roster. Kirby is also ridiculously flexible, as proven by his uncanny ability to swallow everything whole. We know it’s basically established lore that Kirby is 8 inches. That puts them at almost double the international size average, and more than makes up for what Snake’s lost in the rear. Both Kirby and Snake’s styles are clearly complementary, which should make for some entertaining duels.

2. Bayonetta versus Yoshi

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Bayonetta is one of Nintendo’s more mature characters. She’s still basking in the spotlight after the acclaimed port of Bayonetta 2 onto the Switch, and she’s always been a fearsome fighter (if a little niché). Yoshi is a definitely more popular on the Melee tierlists, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that they’re not well-matched fighters.

We know that Bayonetta is capable of some truly hellish feats, including delivering the smackdown on skyscraper-sized dragons. By comparison, Yoshi has another horrifying skill – somehow ingesting everyone into his digestive tract and rebirthing them whole. It’s somehow more impressive than dragging souls straight out of Hell, and we’re into it. Bayonetta has the upper hand when it comes to strength, but the psychological impact of facing Yoshi on the battlefield kinda evens out the odds. Both of them are pros at looking good while kicking ass, so they’re a great match in more ways than one.

1. Ice Climbers versus Ridley

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Ridley is another character that’s gotten some heat since the roster announcement. Most famous for being the asshole that killed Samus’ mother, it’s no surprise that plenty of fighters would love to put that alien down. I mean, Samus has struggled to really put Ridley six feet under, and we all know how capable she is. We’ve looked to the stars for solutions, and we’ve almost always fallen short, even with Nintendo sending its buffest and brightest. Enter the Ice Climbers.

While they may not look like much, they certainly pack a big punch and even bigger hammers. As you may have noticed from their little segment in Smash Switch trailer, they ride in on a small pterodactyl. And what sort of Earth-dwelling creature does Ridley most resemble? You already know – the answer’s a bloody pterodactyl. The fact that the Ice Climbers have tamed a mini-Ridley speaks a lot to their capabilities as fighters. Dinosaurs were no joke, and that mount is about as big as Mr and Mrs Climber themselves. Sure, they’ve had a few nerfs since their introduction to Smash but defeating a dinosaur is like riding a bike, right? It’s just one of those skills that you can’t forget. Samus’ gun show may not be effective, but you these guys won’t be bringing guns to a prehistoric alien fight.

There’s probably a million other match-ups out there that we haven’t covered yet, but we did warn you: we were gunning for the most explosive opponents. We’ve interpreted “explosive” broadly, so we may have missed out on some fan faves like Captain Falcon, Link, and Mario. It’s tough to narrow a list of contenders down since almost everyone has gotten a visual makeover for Smash Switch. However, if we’ve committed a cardinal sin by leaving our your chosen main, let us know in the comments below and tell us how they stack up against our picks!