[Update #2]: This was an April Fools joke.
[Update #1]: The forum thread that contained a summary of the patch notes has also been deleted, possibly lending even more legitimacy to the content of the notes, but we were able to recover one screenshot of a partial patch note.
[Original Story]: Some incredibly explosive patch notes for Overwatch, including a complete Roadhog rework, were posted by the Overwatch team today, but it was apparently too soon to tell the community about that, as going to the post now gives you a wonderful 404 not found notice. Luckily for us, a forum user was able to copy and paste the patch notes into another thread, and we have done the same below.
Many of these seem to be in line with various community requests and complaints on the forums and r/Overwatch. Here are is the entire list of patch notes.
- Added any mention of someone’s gold medals to the chat replace feature, similar to “GG EZ.”
Developer Comments: We’re actively working on a fix to our Medal System to make it more meaningful and representative of how players are actually performing. In the meantime, we felt it necessary to remove “well I have X gold medals” as an argument when discussing who’s at fault for poor performance.
- Added an auto-report feature for anyone who tells you to switch off Widowmaker, Torbjorn, Symmetra, Sombra and Orisa
- Added an auto-report feature for anyone who picks Widowmaker, Torbjorn, Symmetra, Sombra and Orisa
Developer Comments: We also know that players are torn about our recent clarifications on Poor Teamwork, with some people intentionally picking poor heroes as a way to throw the game and other people being reported for legitimately trying to help the team win. To reconcile this debate, everyone who picks these heroes will be automatically reported, and everyone who tells people to switch off these heroes will be automatically reported.
- Biotic Grenade
- Impact damage reduced from 60 to 30, then increased by 100%
- Impact healing reduced from 100 to 50, then increased by 100%
Developer Comments: As we’ve said before, the healing from Ana’s Biotic was too powerful, especially in large groups. But, at the same time, we felt that Ana’s Biotic Grenade was perfectly fine the way it was. In order to reconcile this and reduce the amount of future patch notes we needed to write, we buffed and nerfed it in one patch.
- D.Va will be immune to damage, crowd control and anti-heals for 5 seconds after using Boosters
- Defense Matrix
- Now works as a projectile that can target Junkrat’s RIP-Tire
Developer Comments: We heard your feedback regarding D.Va’s sudden inability to escape almost any situation she dives into, and we agree it’s not the best thing for Overwatch. We think this buff to Boosters will do the trick, while still allowing enemies the opportunity to kill her while she’s boosting. This should modestly increase D.Va’s KDR and winrate.
Additionally, when we told you that Defense Matrix should be used to protect Junkrat’s RIP-Tire, we forgot to tell you about this change we were working on. Our comments should now make a lot more sense, and our D.Va expertise should never again be questioned.
- Chain Hook
- Health decreased from 600 to 300
- Hitting Roadhog will now count double toward your ultimate charge
Developer Comments: After extensive testing, we’ve determined that Roadhog’s Hook was a mistake. Our internal stats showed that even bronze level Roadhog mains were killing opponents once every time the hook was off cooldown, which, in a 20-minute game, meant that they were getting 150 eliminations per game. This artificially ranked them to the Top 500, which, as we know, is entirely made up of other Roadhog mains.
Then there was the issue of Roadhog being too difficult to kill, despite not having any shields or amour, so we dropped his health in half. This solved the problem, making him very easy to kill, but we noticed that the opposing team wasn’t charging their ultimates as quickly as they were before, so we doubled the ult-charge gain from Roadhog hits to compensate.
- Grappling Hook
- Cooldown reduced from 12s to 3s
- Grappling Hook can now only be activated once per game
Developer Comments: Widowmaker’s Grappling Hook continues to be the most useful and effective ability in the game, despite having one of the longest cooldowns. As requested, we have drastically reduced the cooldown of the hook, but we think Widowmaker would be too unstoppable in the right hands if we just left it at that.
- Fixed a bug where you weren’t placed in Grand Master
- Fixed a bug where enough damage could kill Bastion
- Fixed a bug where Bastion had to shoot players to kill them
- Fixed a bug where Reinhardt’s shield could break
- Fixed a bug where Junkrat’s RIP-Tire could actually kill people. That was not intended
- Fixed an issue where Soldier 76 could do damage to enemies not named Pharah. You have one job
- Fixed a bug where the defense couldn’t lose on Eichenwalde