The People Speak: Middle-earth: Shadow of Pizza

Hello, sailors.

You probably scrolled past the byline at the top of this edition of ‘The People Speak,’ but if you didn’t then you’re likely wondering “who the hell is this Paul Tamburro guy, and what did he do with Jonathan Leack?” Well, allow me to answer that question for you: no, I haven’t trapped him in my basement, so please don’t call the police. Starting from today I am the new Executive Editor of GameRevolution, meaning that I’m now behind the wheel of this wonderful site, and I’ll be getting to know you lovely lot over the next few weeks.

Business shall carry on as usual, as evidenced by this new instalment of ‘The People Speak,’ and we’ll continue with the great work you’ve come to expect from the Leack-era GameRevolution (we’re now officially in the Tamburrozoic era, or 1 P.T. for you GameRevolution historians) along with adding my own personal flavor to proceedings. My personal flavor is strawberry, btw, in case any of you were planning on taking me out for ice cream.

I worked for GameRevolution many moons ago (back in 2014) as a freelance reviewer, and after working as a Managing Editor on GR‘s sister site CraveOnline for the past few years, I’ve circled back around again like a bad smell to assume the role of Executive Editor. Anyway, enough about me: let’s talk about you. Specifically, the comments you’ve all been leaving over the course of the past week. Here are our favorites, and I encourage you all to provide me with plenty of brand new ones to laugh, cry and angrily shake my fist at over the course of the next week, mainly because it makes my job a lot more fun. Onwards!


1. Bufford

Article: Middle-earth: Shadow of War Fans Up In Arms Over Pizza Roll Tie-In

Comment: Let’s be honest, most of us will eat Totino’s pizza rolls at some point when playing this game.

Bufford with the intense realism here, cutting through our complaints about weird promo tie-ins to remind us of who we truly are. We’d be angry, if we weren’t so busy eating these delicious Doritos™ before washing them down with a tall glass of Mountain Dew™.


2. Zap Rowsdower

Article: Destiny 2 PC Beta Impressions – Why You Should Wait For the PC Version

Comment: I find PC gamers being more social usually ends up being a bad thing. Either way I have been debating getting it on PS4 since I don’t have a whole lot to play atm, I just don’t want to buy it then a bunch of expensive DLC gets released, which is what happened with the first Destiny.

It may be one of those games I wait on until there’s a GOTY edition. I did enjoy the first game though.

Whaddayamean, PC gamers being social is a bad thing? I’m a PC gamer and a pretty sociable guy, too *headbutts puppy*. PC gamers being anti-social is a common misconception *throws kitten into wood chipper*, and I think it benefits us all to stay away from lazy stereotypes *sets self on fire.*


3. Nanotroll 2

Article: Friday the 13th: The Game Will Get a New Game Mode

Comment: Why isn’t the Jason of this game as powerful or as violent as the Jason of Mortal Kombat X???

I expected to see a “Left 4 Dead” style escape game where Jason kills you 90% of the time.

It was really only a matter of time before the sadomasochists started to seep into the GR comments section.


4. Chunibrow

Article: Dota 2’s Recent Reviews Drop to ‘Mixed’ in Wake of HL3 Controversy

Comment: People are so petty sometimes I can barely believe it.

A friend once owed me £40 and never returned it, so I spent the next few weeks carefully devising a series of scenarios that would lead to him inadvertently returning my money to me pound-by-pound, from “forgetting” my wallet at the bar to “accidentally” not fare-splitting our Uber ride home. I can believe that people are that petty.


5. Starling

Article: Overwatch Patch Drops, Adding Team Deathmatch, Junkrat Changes

Comment: Junkrat now has greater mobility than Pharah, he also deals twice as much damage now and his ult is infinitely better.

And people are calling for nerfs for Pharah because Pharmercy is getting a buff through Mercy.

If the Overwatch community had its way Pharah would have no arms and picking Hanzo on attack would result in an auto-ban.


6. Riddle

Article: Star Citizen Looked Fancy in Gamescom Demo, but Has a Long Way to Go

Comment: Finishing the game 2 years ago was maybe the goal of the original kickstarter, but the game has hugely increased in scope since then. Some may not be happy about that, but most people who have been following the game understood that this was going to be a very long term project. The things they’re having issues with right now are the core mechanics of the game – once they get those working, I think things will speed up significantly.

Optimism in a comments section is always appreciated, even though I’ve grown so impatient waiting for Star Citizen to launch that I’ve chewed off all of my nails, and I’m now just eating my fingers.


7. drathbone

Article: 5 Tips I Wish I Knew Before Starting Pillars of Eternity: Complete Edition

Comment: Something else people might not know is you can make custom henchmen/party members in the inn. When I first started, I thought I was stuck with my only custom character as the main protag and that I had to recruit NPC’s. I probably spent 5+ hours with character creation before settling on a paladin/dwarf.

While the custom characters are a bit dull compared to the NPC party members (less dialogue involvement, no personal quests), you can go to the inn and custom make any race/class combo you want without restarting the game dozens of times like I did.

Everyone loves a useful comment, and drathbone here posted the comments section equivalent of a Swiss Army Knife glued to a rechargeable battery.