In order to celebrate National Boyfriend Day, which takes place every year on October 3, Tyler Treese rounds up the hotties that’ll make your heart pound. Here are the characters that are definitively the best video game boyfriends ever.
Let’s face the facts: while a lot of video games can win over the hearts of players, many of the main protagonists are irredeemable trash. Nathan Drake is constantly lying to his significant other and resorts to thievery and murder for a sense of adventure, Mario is only interested in the chase as he’s off playing tennis or doing other meaningless activities like go-kart racing when Peach isn’t captured, and Big Boss is too busy thinking about the death of his mentor to be emotionally available for anyone. None of these fools would make a good boyfriend, but thankfully there are some better ones if you look hard enough.
William “B.J.” Blazkowicz (Wolfenstein)
You normally wouldn’t want to date a guy that has killed thousands of people, but exceptions can be made when the dead wind up being Nazis. Plus, William has a soft side that is showcased wonderfully in the recent Wolfenstein games, so he’s not just a ruthless killing machine. Although, if there ever winds up being a bunch of Nazis that need killing, you can count on that side of “B.J.” to come out. It’s a good thing to have in your back pocket.
Kazuma Kiryu (Yakuza)
One look at Kazuma Kiryu’s abs and it’s easy to understand why Goro Majima has had a lifelong obsession with his rival. Not only is the “Dragon of Dojima” a remarkable martial artist that can handle himself in a fight, but he also has a heart of gold. Your average guy doesn’t run an orphanage on the side, but Kazuma clearly isn’t average in any way. He puts his all into everything he does, and I’m sure that’s how this sweetheart approaches love as well.
Squall Leonhart (Final Fantasy 8)
Everyone knows that troubled bad boy that they think they can save, and Squall Leonhart definitely falls into that category. This gorgeous hunk has a mysterious past, a sexy scar, and wields the coolest weapon of any Final Fantasy protagonist. Anyone that can master something as difficult as the Gunblade can surely master the intricacies of the bedroom, and that’s something worth celebrating. Plus, he cleans up surprisingly well and will gladly indulge in some ballroom dancing if needed. What a guy!
Phoenix Wright (Ace Attorney)
Nick might be a bit of a goofball, but few characters showcase the goodness in their hearts as much as Phoenix Wright does throughout the Ace Attorney series. He believes in all of his defendants and works tirelessly to make sure they’re innocent. He’s also happy to take in someone else’s kid and treat them as his own, so you know that he’s already cut out to be a great father. His abilities at running a talent agency might be questionable, but Phoenix Wright being a great boyfriend won’t raise any objections from the prosecutor.
Gordon Freeman (Half-Life)
A lot of women would agree that it’d be nice to have a boyfriend that just didn’t talk, and Gordon Freeman is perfect for that. You can call on him whenever you need that stuck pickle jar opened; he’ll do it without a single complaint, and then go back to battling Headcrabs or whatever he does while waiting around for Half-Life 3 to actually happen. Either way, you’d get the perks of companionship without any of the annoyance. It’s really the best of both worlds and you can’t go wrong with that.
Hershel Layton (Professor Layton)
If you are looking to settle down then you can’t go wrong with a gentleman, and that’s exactly what Hershel Layton exemplifies. Not only is Hershel filled with wit and problem-solving abilities, but he’s also a man that minds his manners. It’s worth noting that I’ve never met a jerk who wore a top hat, and the good professor wears his with both style and grace. Anyone looking for a more traditional, old-fashioned romance need to look no further than Hershel Layton.
YoRHa No.9 Type S (NieR: Automata)
Look, YoRHa No.9 Type S (better known as 9S) is a sweet android boy. Sure, he might go off the deep end and lose his mind sometimes, but it was all in the name of love. Ultimately, that is a pretty romantic gesture (a grand one even), and I’m not going to act like we all haven’t gone completely maniacal over your infatuation with someone before. Isn’t that what true love is all about when you really think about it? Okay, maybe 9S is a few software updates away from being an actually good boyfriend, but I believe in the ability for androids to change (although the same can’t be said for humans, sadly).