Screw You, Pikachu. Review

Screw You, Pikachu.

Appearances would have us believe that Pikachu is an unassuming, innocent yellow

rat. Little did we know that Pikachu actually has evil machinations involving

a deliberate plan for world domination. You think that epileptic seizure fiasco

in Japan was an accident? Behind those black eyes and rosy cheeks lies a world

of deception. Who knows what his “pika pikas” really mean? Perhaps, even now,

he’s out to brainwash the children of the world…

Okay, chances are he’s really just a dumb yellow marketing ploy, but sometimes

it truly does seem as though he’s out to take over the world. After all, kids

love him. In yet another coup on the lives of children everywhere, Pikachu has

another game.

Hey You, Pikachu! is a voice recognition game specifically aimed at

everyone under the third grade. This is a game for children who have basic mastery

of the english language and have patient parents to play along. Very patient

parents. Isn’t it just funny how the target audience for this game probably

won’t even know what’s going on without some parental guidance? With this in

mind, the game is smartly conceived and perfect for brainwashing little children

along with their parents. If you’re over the age of 10, avoid this game like

a plague of cooties.

Here’s the premise. You have Pikachu. You have a microphone. Pikachu runs

around in different environments in the game. You talk, yell, and scream at

Pikachu and he responds to you, sometimes in ways you want to, often times in

ways you don’t. This game, interestingly enough, works without strict objectives

– it’s more like a big playground for you and your little buddy (read: enemy).

Included with the game is a Nintendo 64 microphone. Wonderful, another little

accessory that will likely never be used again. Unless, of course, there’s a

sequel called “Whas’ Hapn’n Rankletoodle?” or a “How You Livin’ PoogleyDoogleyPuss!”

Hey You Pikachu’s speech recognition is severely limited for a game

that relies so heavily upon it. The game provides you with keywords with which

to instruct Pikachu. Then, Pikachu listens for the exact phrase/command and

basically ignores everything else. This unfortunately rendered all of Ben’s

pickup lines on the yellow rat completely useless. Or maybe Pikachu’s standards

are too high, I dunno.

Another Pokemon native you’ll find is the wily Professor Oak. At the beginning

of each day, Oak will give you information on how to play with your Pikachu.

Lessons include new keywords that Pikachu can understand and how to manipulate

objects within your inventory. Suffice to say, there’s a whole lot of hand holding

throughout this game.

Your environments are just the same old N64 hash you’ve seen before. These

worlds won’t blow your mind – they’re just colorful and cartoony. The problem

lies within the interface through these little worlds. It’s a plodding, slow

first-person view with extremely limited controls. You can take things out of

inventory and hand them off to Pikachu or just interact with a few things here

and there. Immersive it ain’t, but kids won’t care, since they’ll just be looking

at Pikachu.

And

that’s what this game’s all about – Pikachu. As an animated character he works

really well. The big issue is how much you can stand him. Still, he’s really

well animated, and there’s nothing quite as funny as pissing him off and watching

him get all upset.

Pika, Pika! And more Pika Pika! Yeah, this game’s filled with that noise.

Some love it. By now, most hate it. To a bright-eyed kid, however, it’s perfect

to complete the whole Pokemon experience. Other Pokemon make their cameos here

and there, and each of them have accurate sound bites.

Hey You, Pikachu is a game clearly targeted for a specific and direct

market – namely, the little tykes in the family. But a deeper Pikachu AI and

a stronger level of voice recognition could have made this game much more interesting.

If there were some kind of branch progression throughout the game that allows

you to train your Pikachu instead of just playing peek-a-boo with it, this game

might have been a little more tolerable.

What makes this game a bit intolerable, though, is the obscene price tag.

Hey You, Pikachu’s MSRP is $89.99…almost the cost of the N64 itself! It

seems that Pikachu isn’t satisfied with invading our homes and brainwashing

our children, since he’s also stealing our wallets as well. Someone call an

exterminator.

So, to most of the GR readers, I’m warning you to stay away. It’s the video

game equivalent of going to the library and reading a Golden Book instead

of Tolstoy. But if you have a really young sibling or even a child of

your own who definitely likes Pikachu and can bear all his long term annoyances,

there might be a possible Christmas present there.

Of course, you could always blow the 90 bucks on a few Pokemon videos and a

copy of Pokemon Snap. I wonder if Pikachu can

understand inflation?